Doing what I do, I’ve heard just about every excuse (explanation, rationalization, justification) in the book. Of course there are legitimate barriers and hurdles that we need to overcome in our quest to create our best life, body, career, business, relationships, health, etc. but what really stands between most people and their goals is usually quite different to what’s on their official list of well-used excuses.
Alleged Barriers to Success.
Here’s some of the pseudo-reasons why so many people don’t achieve their goals.
1. Lack of time. In a country where the average person watches twenty plus hours of TV each week, I don’t think time is actually what holds us back. It’s an issue… but it’s not the reason.
2. Lack of ability. Success is rarely about how much talent we have and mostly about what we do with what we’ve been given (how we use that ability).
3. Genetics. See point two. Can’t change our genetics but we can change what we do with them. Obesity is not about genetics, it’s about poor genetic management.
4. Lack of opportunities. While many people are waiting for an opportunity to fall on their head from a great height, successful people are out there creating their own opportunities.
5. Other people. The only person who’s gonna stand between where you are now and where you wanna be, is you. Sure some people will get in your way periodically, but they don’t ultimately determine success or failure in your world, you do.
6. Bad luck, destiny, fate. Santa, the Easter Bunny, Spiderman.
7. The government. If the government are the reason you’re failing, then why are others succeeding? Big, nasty government. They don’t always make it easy for you, but they ain’t what’s stopping you.
8. Fast food companies. They produce it. You choose it. Or not.
9. Lack of motivation. If success was dependent on being permanently motivated, everybody would fail because we all go through peaks and troughs of motivation. People who reach their goals do what they need to do, even when the ‘feeling’ of motivation ain’t there. Motivation is a temporary emotional state.
10. Ignorance. Of course education is an important ingredient in the success recipe, but most of us have enough knowledge, awareness, understanding and intelligence to succeed. We mostly know what to do, but we don’t always do what we know. The morbidly obese person doesn’t eat cake because of ignorance, he/she eats it because they lack discipline and self-control. And because their biggest driver is short-term pleasure. The instant reward system.
So we know what ‘allegedly’ holds us back, but what really stands between us and our goals?
1. Poor attitude. For most of us, attitude is the biggest determinant of the kind of results we produce in our world. Our attitude determines what we do, which determines what we create. Many people sabotage their ability with their stinky attitude and their toxic self-talk.
2. Apathy and laziness. Some people just don’t wanna do what it takes. Sadly, we are the short-cut society and the quick-fix generation. Results without effort; that’s what we want. Good luck with that.
3. Fear. A certain level of fear is normal. Healthy even. Being controlled by fear, not so good. At all.
4. Procrastination. Always about to start something amazing. Sure. For too many of us it’s always soon, never now. Your life is not a dress-rehearsal for the real thing.
5. Poor planning. Knowing where you wanna go is one thing. Strategic planning and implementation of that plan is another thing. All the discipline, self-control and motivation won’t produce optimal results unless they are attached to a practical plan.
6. Over-thinking. Analysis paralysis. I’ve spoken about it many times before. If the term ‘over-thinker’ elicits some kind of an emotional response in you, then… you know.
7. Lack of discipline and self control. Back in the old days these attributes proved to be quite effective. Apparently they still work.
8. We don’t finish stuff. Sure I could be more technical, but do I really need to be?
9. We invest our emotional energy in the wrong place; jealousy, resentment, anger, greed, bitterness, etc. We waste what we’ve got. We hold on to crap and make ourselves ugly and unproductive.
10. Poor communication. Too many of us don’t master (or even work at) life’s most important skill. If you can’t create connection, rapport and mutual understanding with the people in your world, you better learn. Quickly.
11. We lack clarity. We know we want success… we just don’t know what that is! If you can’t define it, you can’t have it. When we get clarity we create excitement and momentum and we start to produce better results in our world.
12. Self doubt. If there’s a way to shoot ourselves in the foot with a really big self-doubt gun, we’ll find it. Perhaps we should stop that?
Perhaps you’d like to share some of the exciting and creative ways, you’ve discovered to waste your time, talent and opportunities. And then maybe you could tell us how you overcame that!
Or you could just share a thought or comment.
Ciao x
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{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }
I am not sure how exciting it is, but I spent a lot of time avoiding success by just stopping when things got too hard. Or by not leaving my comfort zone. Hardly creative, but definitely worked.
However… something snapped when I discovered that I no longer cared about my comfort zone and I didn’t give a stuff if it god ‘too hard’. Because I wanted something more – I wanted a new life.
Simple, no? but that’s what has happened… I found a goal and I aimed for it. Some people might say “Big Deal, you trained for a mini triathlon – now you’re done, what else will you do? Gonna move back to Fat City?”
HELL NO!
Because I am now focused on the next goal. And you know what? For me, Achievement is the remedy for an extreme case of couch arse. (the widen of ones arse through as little activity as possible) but self satisfaction is what gets me out of bed at 5am to go out and exercise.
I’ll stop my ramble here – thanks Craig.
I was first contemplating listing all of the listed alleged and real barriers to success that applied to me. But then I thought: which ones don’t apply to me? That’s sad. I’m nearly 29 and I feel I’ve wasted so much of my emotional energy on crap when I could have used it much more productively and find myself in a different ‘place’ than I do today.
I don’t think I blame the government (yet)! I haven’t been in the workforce for long enough to see 1/2 of my hard earned taxes slip into the tax mans pocket. Being a full time student on a student allowance though is tough- I can thank my parents tons for helping to support me.
I would say lack of confidence in self is a major barrier for me. When you tell yourself you’re a failure and you’re not good enough after several years you really start to believe its your reality. I compare myself to everyone far too frequently. Why? I’m not exactly aiming on Gold at the Olympics, so who really is my biggest rival? It’s me.
I can say I have wasted many hours on the likes of facebook and msn and just ‘googling’ random things of interest. Not so much now though. I have also been addicted to a particular drama series on tv too, but I’ve really kicked that habbit. How much fitter would we be as a nation if we cut out half of our tv viewing and/or pointless internet useage (I say pointless, as certain sites are/can be quite useful- such as this one, of course) and replaced it with physical activity? I would much rather now spend the 30-60 mins a day swimming or at the gym or outside for a ‘run’.
Procrastination, not finishing stuff, analysis paralysis… I wont start on any of that. Instead I will focus on finding solutions.
Another great post Craig. Makes you think about what really is holding us back. It’s not ‘stuff’ out there in the big world, its ‘stuff’ inside out damn head.
PS. Did you see my progress/productivity report on your previous post? I might know some more stuff by midday tomorrow.
Surely you are not saying that we need to take responsibility for our own actions
Craig,
Once again you have given me a timely post!! Are you spying on me? lol
My motivation took a holiday and left me feeling somewhat flat. I gave myself a good shake and talking to and have decided that I need to get back on with making me the best I can.
Enough is enough!!!
Hugs for always saying the right thing at the right time for me!
Michelle xx
it's nearly 1am & bubs has been crying most of the night (a VERY demanding baby!) I often feel she is "someone" that gets in the way (not a nice thing to say!).. and I know that's not true.
I am such an ambitious woman & feel "choked" constantly due to not being able to achieve not just business ideas, but not even normal "personal" daily tasks lol! As I type this, her crying must have woken up another one of my kids (2yo) who is now crying (in her sleep?). This goes on most nights until the sun comes up (then there's more struggling throughout the day lol)…
I am doing my best at patience, patience, patience .. but how do I settle (or maintain) the thrill of such awesome business ideas & dreams of achieving basic daily chores, but not be able to do anything with them. It is creating that urghhy anxious feeling inside knowing I'm up day and night with these kiddies GRRRR whilst these ideas are just "sitting there"
Ooooh there goes my 6yo now *doh*
Hubby tells me to wait until they're all at school to have that time, but I'm too ambitious & too excited to wait another 5 years.
Help. Any ideas? How do I settle myself & my bursting excitement! (+ stop myself from pulling my hair out at the same time)
ok ok ok. I'm going to look at
(1) poor attitude – I keep thinking I can't do things because of the kids/how they are demanding 24/7.
(5) poor planning – yep, close the browser windows/ebay etc lol (which runs into 7). oh and
(10) book time in for hubby to take children off my hands!!!
Mmmmm ok, that's a good start.
gotta go & attend to the choir
xoxoxox
Bad luck, destiny, fate. Santa, the Easter Bunny, Spiderman.
Funny but sooo true!
Is taking a break from study to read an internet blog classified as procrastination?
Hey Craig, yes another great post. My problem is I can get stuck into a fitness regime only to have visitors come to stay and then blame my failure on them! Sad I know but I have only recently realised I dont have to have those drinks and nibblies just because they are or they are here, and so what if I hate the exercise machines they dont care! I have discovered my love hate relationship with them now and guess what…. its working!
Week 7 begins on my blitz I better see some changes soon or maybe I will just give up!!?
yea right not this time around thankyou!!!
( ) x
I reckon I’ve fallen into every catagory (excluding blaming the government) that’s listed at one time or another.
Today I was thinking what I would use as an excuse to fail to lose 8kg and I can’t come up with one so I’d best be getting of the computer and doing something about it right now.
avagooday all.
Suu
Good for you Annie – thanks for sharing.. ( )
Hi Jules – yep, saw your progress report – good for you – sounds like you’re slowly getting on top of things – most importantly… the things in your head!
Keep it up… ( )
Yes Michelle I have been spying on you – what did you think that red light near that vent in the kitchen was?
( )
Go Trace!!
( )
Hi Suu
Yes, you best…
( )
I’m with Michelle. Have just spent the last 10 mins looking for CCTV cameras in my house!
One of my least favourite sayings in “The system has failed them”. Really? I would have thought that somewhere down the chain of events, someone has failed themselves and failed to live up to their responsibilities.
Thanks Craig
Janice
You've probably guessed self doubt is big for me. one thing i've noticed is when i actually do well i refuse to admit it to myself i think it's just my way of wanting to keep myself down for whatever reason. It's easier to feel down about everything it's an excuse not to do anything. Not sure why that is but it doesn't matter now so long as i stop doing that and i think i'm on my way. I thank my trainer for this. After so many months of thinking i'm getting nowhere, i can finally see improvement in my fitness but i refused to acknowledge that. My trainer was telling me the other week how much my jump squats and push ups have improved but he can see in my eyes i don't believe it. He said 'your never going to be satisfied with yourself are you? You don't realise that everything you say about yourself is negative'. He's right. So i sat down and gave myself a good talking to and admitted that i have noticed improvement and i am stronger. Now that i've opened my eyes I can finally see progression and what a great thing it is to see yourself improve. I think sometimes people are so focused on reaching their goal, they don't enjoy the ride. I've never paid attention to that before probably because i've always focused on what i can't do and how bad i feel about myself that i completely overlooked the positive stuff & how good it can feel to see little changes in yourself. This progression thing is motivating. I'm now more focused in the gym because i'm thinking what i need to do to get stronger and how i can't wait to be fitter instead of being obsessed about my flabby thighs and what a long way i still have to go. Now that i've discovered this 'progression' thing i've become obsessed with it(maybe you could do a post on it)and i'm thinking where else in my life have i let myself down because i didn't acknowledge or couldn't see when i had done or have been doing well. Not that you should pat yourself on the back for every good thing you do but just to pay attention to what you doing. Like i said, enjoy the ride and feel good about what your doing for yourself. The more improvements i see the more it motivates me for all the right reasons. My focus has always been on weightloss. If i could see myself getting skinnier than that would motivate me but as soon as i hit a plateau i would crash. I should have been focusing on the other gains i was making.
I'm not really sure how else to explain it. Oh wait. Goals. That's the word i should be using right? Progression…goals. Duh! Jees i can be thick sometimes.
I guess all i can say is that i wished i paid more attention to this before because it's starting to feel pretty good.
I know i'm motormouth today. I swear i'm not on drugs it's just the endorphins.
Ange
IMHO the main barrier to success is the "beast of self-doubt & negativity" that lurks in the deep recesses of one's mind.
Taming this beast is hard if one isn't taught the tools to tame it during one's formative years and it's fed by parents who are also battling their own beasts.
As I stare down the big 40, it's taken me three quarters of my life to tame the beast.
In some ways I feel that while goals and success are worthwhile having, it's the journey and the lessons learnt that is of greatest value.
Cheers
G’day Craig
This time I was specifically looking for what you might have to say on planning and somehow found my way to this post.
The boss has asked me to produce a 2 week training program based on outdated, partially completed session plans… and in 2 days.
I can do it, but the quality won’t be what I want, I know it, but this post told me all the things I need to know and do to be able to at least get the job done.
4 to 8 and 11 usually get me. Not tomorrow.
You have an uncanny knack of getting to the heart of a situation without making your readers feel overwhelmed. In fact the reverse is true. (Of course, that’s what you’re trying to do…but as far as I can tell, every time)
We’ll see how well the trainee turns out. He’ll be a star I know it…thanks to me (FIGJAM !!)
Thanks yet again Craig
Craig, once again another great post!
I admit I’m a huge procrastinator, I just can’t seem to get work done. Thankfully my friends helped me get back on track. I just have to motivate myself and try to force myself to work really hard, because in the end if I don’t, it means 1000000x more work to do in one night.
Now i’m procrastintating again… gotta go back to work. Thanks for this post, it help me realized that I really need to work!
Good day to everyone.