Hey!
Once a fortnight (or so) here at me-dot-com, I walk to the back of the cyber-classroom and hand over the teaching reins and coach’s whistle to you, my readers. Today is that day. Keep in mind that you don’t need to be a guru, genius or expert to teach the rest of us something (I’m none of those things, so there’s your proof). No, you just need to be willing to share your thoughts, ideas, opinions and experiences.
So, how do we make a success pie? What are the ingredients? How much of each do we need? Will the pie taste as good without all of the ingredients listed below? Do we need them all? Will the required ingredients vary depending on the type of success pie we’re baking? That is, depending on the goal?
Below is a list of skills, qualities and attributes I’ve identified as ranking somewhere between ‘handy to have’ and ‘totally non-negotiable’ for me on my self-discovery, self-development and self-awareness journey.
1. Talent (4)
2. Self-control (7)
3. Willingness to get uncomfortable (8)
4. Resilience (7)
5. Best attitude (whatever that means) (7)
6. Planning (4)
7. Decision-making skills (7)
8. Adaptability (7)
9. Communication skills (8)
10. Self-awareness (6)
11. Passion (8)
12. Perseverance (8)
13. Willingness to unlearn (6)
14. Humility (6)
15. Clarity (of purpose and goal) (7)
16. Ability to deal with problems quickly (6)
17. Support (7)
18. A solution-focus (8)
19. Courage (7)
20. To be proactive (7)
A few questions:
1. What would you add to the list?
2. In terms of your goals, what are your three non-negotiables (from the list)?
3. In terms of your goals, what are the three least important ingredients?
4. Of the above twenty performance variables (pie ingredients), how do rate where you’re at right now (out of ten). A score of ten being, you’re totally ace and there’s no room for improvement. One being lots of room for improvement. And five being okay but there’s still some work to do. The numbers in brackets are the scores I gave myself. Gotta say, rating myself was one of the hardest things I’ve done for a long time. Being totally unemotional and objective is pretty much impossible when it comes to evaluating ourselves.
As always, feel free to answer as many or as few questions as you like. Or, you can simply leave a comment. 
Love this article? Sign up for my FREE Email Newsletter today to receive more articles like this, and my FREE Ebook!
Post Footer automatically generated by Add Post Footer Plugin for wordpress.
{ 8 trackbacks }
{ 17 comments… read them below or add one }
Faith!
Hi.
I think you have pretty much covered it there Craig but a few extra ingredients that sprung to mind after reading this post were
1. Mind control (which could be included in self control)
2. following your instincts
3. being someone that ‘does’ not someone that thinks about doing! (proactve)
4. happiness
I think that having control over your mind is the most important ingredient for this pie! To be able to actively control your thoughts, your emotions and therefore your positivity, motivation and focus is my number one goal.
Over the last few years i have learnt that whenever i have a tough, life changing decision to make i have found that if i follow my instintcts,intuition or gut feeling i have always made the right decision. Even though thoughts are useful and essential (to some extent) the best decisions i have made have come from my instincts.
You always hear ya mates and people around you saying things like
- im quitting smoking next month
-im gonna start exercise on monday
-screw it im gonna go travel next year
but not very often these things happen. JUST DO IT
If you arent a happy person it makes it very difficult to create positive things in your life so i think by thinking happy thoughts, doing things that make you happy, being around and mixing with people that make you happy then ya on the right track.
Im in no way on top of any of those but i am trying and actively seeking ways to continuously improve them all.
Cheers
Integrity
1. What would you add to the list?
Apathy – towards negativity especially from others
2. In terms of your goals, what are your three non-negotiables (from the list)?
Willingness to unlearn
Perserverence
Support
3. In terms of your goals, what are the three least important ingredients?
None
4. Of the above twenty performance variables (pie ingredients), how do rate where you’re at right now (out of ten). A score of ten being, you’re totally ace and there’s no room for improvement. One being lots of room for improvement. And five being okay but there’s still some work to do. The numbers in brackets are the scores I gave myself. Gotta say, rating myself was one of the hardest things I’ve done for a long time. Being totally unemotional and objective is pretty much impossible when it comes to evaluating ourselves.
too hard
Being honest
Career 6
Health 5
Attitude 7
Overall – approaching 8
Relationships 1
So a lot to do but i give a 9 for moving in the right direction using the above recipe
Oh dear, I was never any good at cooking! ALL of these are important.
If my goal is a happy life, my most important ingredients are self-awareness (8), best attitude (8) and communication skills (3 – working on this one). Best attitude covers a multitude of qualities, I think perseverence, self-control, resilience, a solution-focus and being proactive are all part of it.
Willingness to get uncomfortable links with courage for me, as it takes courage to choose to become uncomfortable. I didn’t know how to rate it because it’s so subjective. It may not take much to make someone uncomfortable, but that might mean that they’re more familiar with the sensation.
Also, support is a bit of a strange one, I think it’s really important, but it’s not a personal quality, it comes from the people around you – although I suppose you choose who you want to have around you to an extent.
My least important ingredients are talent (6), ability to deal with problems quickly (9, but that’s not always a good thing, sometimes it’s worth more to sit down and think things through before acting), and humility (5), which is another odd one. Too little humility is obnoxious, but too much humility is debilitating because it means you lack confidence.
So if I was adding an ingredient to the list, it would be self-confidence (6), bearing in mind the difference between self-confidence and arrogance.
Do you get a second go if your pie turns out strange?
I would add …
- visioning
- dealing with ambiguity
- motivating yourself with skill
By visioning, I don’t mean day dreaming or anything lofty. I mean using proven practices like either from NLP (stepping into your future) or something from the military like “Future Picture” (with a 12-point check of what a good vision is.)
I see people that are good planners and maybe even good at executing, but they don’t have the ability to dream big or dream up the right things or even draw their vision so others can follow. It’s a mush dream in their mind if at all. Working on this one skill separates the doers from those that do great things.
I’d say the ability to work well with others (whether you like them or not) is a valuable success skill and needs to be added to the list. Non-negotiables would be decision making, adaptability, passion. Least important is hard to narrow down, all the above are necessary for success . . .
Good morning guys,
One that came to mind was ‘DRIVEN’.
So i did what i always do and looked it up on my trusty macbook pro dictionary.
Definition of DRIVEN:
‘The determination and ambition of a person to achieve something’.
I also think that you need to posses on some level each and all of those skills, qualities and attributes listed, simply because they compliment each other.
Another that just popped into my mind while writing this is ‘Trust’ or ‘Self Trust’.
For example i have caught myself many times questioning my knowledge (macbook pro dictionary), my skills and probably at some point a lot of the things listed above.
So i try to make a conscious effort in monitoring whether i am reacting to a situation in a certain way just because i dont ‘trust’ my knowledge, skills etc.
Cheers
patience
All good things come to those who wait, as long as you have your plan and goals in mind and set out to achieve them you will succeed….I believe.
None to add here – pretty comprehensive Craig! – but I would split “support” into technical support and emotional support. Sometimes we need support in the form of someone who can show us how to plan, how to be more effective in training etc. And sometimes support needs to be in the form of a friend who reminds us, when we are down or struggling, to KEEP ON GOING!
Answered based on goal of improving weight and fitness:
1. What would you add to the list?
a. Nothing
2. In terms of your goals, what are your three non-negotiables (from the list)?
a. Self-awareness
b. Perseverance
c. Clarity (of purpose and goal)
3. In terms of your goals, what are the three least important ingredients?
a. Talent
b. Humility
c. Decision making skills
4. Of the above twenty performance variables (pie ingredients), how do rate where you’re at right now (out of ten). A score of ten being, you’re totally ace and there’s no room for improvement. One being lots of room for improvement. And five being okay but there’s still some work to do. The numbers in brackets are the scores I gave myself. Gotta say, rating myself was one of the hardest things I’ve done for a long time. Being totally unemotional and objective is pretty much impossible when it comes to evaluating ourselves.
1. Talent (4)
2. Self-control (4)
3. Willingness to get uncomfortable (6)
4. Resilience (7)
5. Best attitude (whatever that means) (6)
6. Planning (8)
7. Decision-making skills (8)
8. Adaptability (8)
9. Communication skills (8)
10. Self-awareness (9)
11. Passion (4)
12. Perseverance (4)
13. Willingness to unlearn (8)
14. Humility (8)
15. Clarity (of purpose and goal) (6)
16. Ability to deal with problems quickly (7)
17. Support (4)
18. A solution-focus (6)
19. Courage (4)
20. To be proactive (7)
My friend Kate gave me this list gleaned from the writings of Sri Swami Sivananda, which can lead individuals towards success in their chosen path in life.
She thought they would benefit me and handy to remember – physically, mentally and spiritually.
1. Have a simple and unassuming manner of life.
2. Live not to eat, but eat to live.
3. Bear no envy. Commit no slander. Speak no falsehood. Practise no deceit. Harbor no malice. You will be ever joyful, happy and peaceful.
4. Righteousness is the rule of life. Lead a virtuous life. Study the lives of role models and draw inspiration from them.
5. Cultivate a melting heart, the giving hand, the kindly speech, the life of service, equal vision, and impartial attitude. Your life will, indeed, be blessed.
6. Lead a regulated life. Take hold of each day as if it were the last day.
7. Live in the present. Forget the past.
8. Understand well the meaning of life, and then start the quest.
9. Life is thy greatest gift. Utilize every second profitably.
10. Success often comes to those who dare and act. It seldom comes to the timid.
Craig, I reckon these ingredients would make a wicked cheescake.
Well a very exhaustive list.. the Non negotiables for me
Passion;
Resistance
Planning
Perserverance…
Personaly I dont believe in patience.. you are committed or your not – SIMPLE
love the rolling theme…I’m getting in touch with my philosophical side which I’m really enjoying
Ok so today we are talking about pies…and like so many pies there are good ones and bad ones – a colleague used to have a shepherds pie and big M for breakfast every morning at work – for me thats a bad one…all that mashed potato on top….
On the flip side there is the metaphorical pie we are tucking into now…
Some of my ingredients not listed:
> reflection
> contemplation
> learning
> reaction (to the findings of the above 3 – practicing what I preach)
These are all things I’ve considered since the start of the 28 day challenge that I am trying to keep top of mind (rewiring….and there’s a lot of hardwiring that needs to be fixed)…along with
> remember its a jouney
> don’t isolate myself – unless meditating or reflecting since the others can be done with people / accountability
> challenge my norm / conventional thinking (remember norm from the ads…not him)
> Kai Zen – personal philosophy…make progress
> Stamina
Non negotiables
1. Kai Zen – continuous improvement
2. reaction – don’t just think…do
3. Stamina – just keep swimming swimming swimming (think Dory in finding Nemo)
3 least important
…must be a trick question – they are all important – but will change at different times according to need, frame of mind, emotional state etc…at least I think that way ?
I’ll be rating tonight and no doubt its going to take ages and be very hard but being a self rated non expert I’ll find a way to get through it.
…and its always interesting reading others thoughts too.
cheers
I read somewhere that a survey of Harvard Business Graduates who were millionairs wrote their goals down and read them on a daily basis. The graduates who were billionairs wrote their goals down and read them twice a day, so maybe FOCUS is the key to success.
It seems like you’ve covered the list of skills and the 3 I’d choose for accomplishing my goals include self-control/mind control, passion and clarity while talent is the only one that I consider least important.
It will be interesting next week to see how I accomplish my work as we are gone Tue–Sun. Camping at a rendezvous so my metronome practice will need to wait; but I can work on learning 3 songs without complications while rendezvousing.
Would love to spend more time on this one – but three others that come to mind right now are:-
Belief;
Intention; and
Patience – I understand what Kate means however sometimes when we are patient and allow some “time” what we thought we wanted is not what we wanted at all!? Good things come to those who (actively) wait? Of course if you want to win the lotto – you still have to buy a ticket!