My job means that I spend much of my life working with people who want to change something about their reality.
People who would like to be fitter, healthier, leaner, lighter, happier, wealthier, less stressed, more fulfilled…. people who want to create some kind of positive change.
I always ask them some questions:
1. Have you tried to change before?
2. What happened last time?
3. What do you really want (and why)?
4. What are you prepared to do to create that change?
5. Why will it be different this time?
My experience tells me that if they can’t answer these questions quickly and confidently, they probably won’t create real change.
Some do, but not many.
I have worked with thousands of people who have been ‘about to change’… for years.
They say that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome.
We don’t want to acknowledge it…. but that’s what many of us do.
Constantly.
We pride ourselves on the fact that we are students of life; the world is our classroom and everyday is a new lesson.
Sure.
We keep doing the same dumb things.
If we’re ‘learning’ so much…. then why do we continue to make the same mistakes?
Maybe we confuse hearing (or reading) information with learning.
Knowing something only becomes real learning when we attach it to doing…. and create some forever change.
We have the same conversations about the same issues.
The same arguments.
We make the same dumb decisions.
Use the same excuses.
Fall into the same traps.
But what if today was the day that we made a decision and took the action which would change our life, our reality and our destiny… forever?
Not for a day, week or month like we normally do… but for the rest of our life.
What if today was the day that we went to a Personal Development site and instead of being entertained, amused, educated or temporarily motivated we walked away from our computer with a different attitude, a fresh focus, a new resolve and a commitment to take action and address issues in our life which should, or could have, been addressed long ago?
No matter how comfortable, convenient, practical or popular that action was.
What if today was the day we stopped making excuses forever.
Stopped rationalising and justifying destructive, unproductive behaviours… (I don’t have the resources, the money, the knowledge, the genetics, the talent, the support, the time)?
What if today was the day that we stopped waiting for the right time?
It never comes.
(We are the procrastination nation).
What if today was the day that we realised that it’s not a time issue, it’s an us issue; a priorities issue, a laziness issue, an organisational issue, an attitude issue, a fear issue….
What if today we started a new exercise program and eating regime and we kept it up….. and kept it up… and kept it up.
Forever.
“Oh don’t be stupid Craig… we know when we go on the diet… we’re going to go off it at some stage.”
We consistently make decisions that we don’t follow through on.
We fail (mostly) because we don’t finish what we start.
Always starting, rarely finishing.
It gets uncomfortable… we chuck it in.
What if today we became the person who not only started things but the person who always finished them?
What if we became renowned for our perseverance?
Our passion, our drive, our commitment.
What if today was the day that we stopped being precious?
Stopped looking for the easy option and instead looked for the most effective one?
What if today was the day we became proactive and not reactive?
What if we made decisions and took action before we were forced to?
What if today was the day that we stopped accepting and rationalising mediocrity and started striving for excellence?
What if today we stopped limiting ourselves?
Stopped finding reasons to fail?
(Most of us don’t have a clue about what’s really possible for us).
We think we do….
We don’t.
What if today was the day that we acknowledged that success is not about opportunities, situations, circumstances, other people, ability or genetic potential….. but is all about action, commitment, organisation, planning, vision, self control, attitude, effort and mental toughness?
What if today was the day we chose to be that person that everyone wants to be around… that positive, happy, fun person who always seems to have time for everyone?
What if today we chose to be the person who is more concerned with making others feel great than ourselves look good?
What if today we chose to be Mr or Mrs glass half-full?
What if today was the day that we stopped beating ourselves up?
(Beating ourselves up emotionally or psychologically is pointless, destructive and really annoying for everyone around us!)
What if today was the day that we realised that ‘failure’ is a label that we give certain experiences, situations, circumstances or events?
(One person labels an experience a ‘failure’ while another calls it a ‘learning experience’).
What if today was the day we began to focus on (and do something about) the things that we can change and stopped focusing on the things we can’t?
(We often spend more time, effort and emotional energy on the things we can’t change than we do on the things we can…)
What if today we did the things we need to do instead of the things we want to do?
What if today was the day we started to give our bodies the right types and amounts of food at the right time, instead of being social, emotional, reactive, comfort eating, food-aholics?
Not you of course, but perhaps someone you know.
What if today was the day we realised that the way we see things is not necessarily how they are? (We don’t see things as they are; we see things as we are.)
What if today was the day we decided to listen more and talk less.
Judge less and understand more.
Be patient and tolerant.
If you so choose… today (this moment) can be a turning point in your life.
It can be the start of something amazing.
……or it can just be another day.
Drop me a line and let me (okay, us) know where you’re from.
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{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }
I love your point on:
“success is not about opportunities, situations, circumstances, other people, ability or genetic potential….. but is all about action, commitment, organisation, planning, vision, self control, attitude, effort and mental toughness?”
These are all things that I can achieve by myself.
Thank You Craig
tbilisi, georgia
Hi Teona,
we need to take charge of the stuff we can control… and take a chill-pill about the rest.
Thanks for saying hi…
One of the things that has stopped me before is even though I want to change, my friends, my family, and all my peers all want to be the same and act the same.
I feel like I don’t have any support and maybe that is just how it has to be.
I am not blaming them I am blaming me. I need to be able to change regardless of how they are. Adana,Turkey.
Hi Craig,
I liked your article. If only more people could read it and make a decision!
As for myself, I found the “changing” part quite easy, after that moment of decision. It happened quite a long while ago, and today I’m happy with myself. Nevertheless, what I find more difficult is maintaining this status which I like, resisting all those things and thoughts which tend to change me again, but this time into somebody I don’t want to become.
I see lots of coaches and motivational speakers training people on change management. I’ve attended such seminars, as well. (Not that I wanted to, but the company I used to work for at that time was a big fan of change management). It’s like everybody wants to change, or everybody should change… it’s like a trendy, fashionable thing… and if you say you don’t want to change, they look at you as if you were some Neanderthal creature, not understanding the real, present world. I’m not saying this is bad, but I was to draw attention to the other side of the coin: what happens after the change?
What do you think: is it easier to go for a change or to resist it? At least, how was it for you?
“What if today we chose to be Mr or Mrs glass half-full?”
This is great advice! I spent years being Mrs glass half empty, until I realised I had achieved nothing, all I had done was settle for less than I deserved. It took some time to train myself to think differently, but once I did my options opened up and I reached heights I never thought possible.
Kate in England
Hi Ziya,
if you want to be exceptional then you need to do exceptional things..
Exceptional = what everyone else ISN’T doing.
You can do it.
Hi Simonne,
generally it’s easier NOT to change (in the short term) but far less rewarding, fulfilling or stimulating in the long term. I think change ‘for the sake of it’ is silly but identifying things which need to be addressed in your world and then systematically going about creating positive change is a very rewarding experience…(is for me anyway)
Cheers.
Kate,
from this day forth you shall be known throughout all the land as MGHF.
You need a T shirt with that on it!
Good for you champion.
Nice, just what I needed, thanks…I’m going to go read it again!
Its funny how people can weave into the minds of others…A few of Craig’s lines are positively influencing my chatterbox (and he is winning more often
)
Hey Prankster,
glad I’m permeating your grey matter!
have a god day.
Yeh… Ok… I wanna change… be a “betta person” (what ever that is…) How do I keep that going??? I’ve lost count of how many times I’d like to change…be a betta person (how ever I perceive that person to be…)
How do I keep that feelin’ going? And as someone else pointed out… How do I keep the changes going when everyone around me keeps expecting me to be/act like the person I was?
Jen (in the “wilds”)
Craig I’m a first timer on your site but I sure picked an amazing first read…
That was absolutely fantastic, with excellent writing to boot.
Thanks so much,
Raphael
Hey Raphael,
you’re welcome.
Nice to meet you.