Stumbling into the Future.

When I walk into a room to do a presentation I regularly ask a few questions before we get under way:

“Who wants to live an amazing life?” (every hand goes up)
“Who wants to have an amazing career?” (every hand goes up again)
“Who wants incredible relationships?” (every hand)
“Who wants more.” (every hand)

To the uninitiated, it would appear that everyone in the room is pretty sure about what they want…

They want amazing.
They want incredible.
They want more.

Cool; they know what they want… that’s a good start.

Or do they?

Then the tricky questions come:

“What does your amazing life look like, what will make it amazing and how will you create it?”
(errr… aah… mm… silence and much glancing around the room)

“And by the way, what exactly is… more?
(no hands up, more silence)

The truth for many of us is that we know what we don’t want (our current life and reality) but we haven’t really clearly defined exactly what we do want.

So many of us lack clarity and certainty about (what we want for) our future:

Where we want to be.
What we want to do.
What we want our life to look like in 1, 2, 5 or 10 years from now.
We kinda think that somehow it’s all just gonna fall into place.

It ain’t.
We don’t ‘accidentally’ end up with an amazing life.

We know we want to be somewhere better.
It’s just that we’re not that sure where better is… or what it looks like.

“So you hate your life… what would you like to be doing?”
“Er.. not sure.”

“You say you want more.. what does that mean SPECIFICALLY?”
“Aah.. dunno”

Before you can create amazing, you need to define it.
For you.
Personally.

Not anyone else’s version of an amazing life… yours.

If you can’t conceive it, you can’t achieve.

So many of us are sitting at that great big T-intersection of life…. looking right, looking left… one foot on the brake, one on the accelerator, checking the mirror… not exactly sure what the heck we’re doin’.

A picture of indecision.

We might have all the good intentions, all the motivation and all the potential in the world… but if we don’t have certainty and clarity about what we want to do with our life and how we’re going to do it… then it’s gonna be a little tough to create amazing.

Living in the land of uncertainty only creates mediocrity, boredom and frustration.

We need to get SPECIFIC, SERIOUS and CLEAR about what we want for our future.

But How?

Sometimes (now perhaps) we need to (metaphorically) step out of our life, our situation, our reality, our relationships and our busy-ness…. get some distance, get some perspective, take some time and stop ‘doing’ until we can answer those tough questions.

Think.
Be still (a wacky concept in 2007).
Go away for a week (a day at least).
Alone.
No phone, no noise, no distractions.
Don’t ask others what you should do… ask YOU!

Think about your life, your health, your relationships, your career, your past, your future.. and don’t expect to get some life-changing, mind altering revelation in five minutes.
Spend some quiet time with yourself and listen to that still, small voice.
It’s there… you just need to listen.
Patiently.
Remember… the relationship between effort and outcome is directly proportional.
So make the effort.
Take the time.

Sometimes we spend more time and energy planning for a big night out… than we do planning for the rest of our life.

Being busy going around in circles… is dumb.
Being busy for a purpose is clever and rewarding.

Stop stumbling along and get some clarity.
Once you get clarity… you’ll create momentum.
And once you create momentum.. you’ll create results.

You’ll create more.
You’ll create incredible.
You’ll create amazing.

* Leave a comment and tell us where you’re from.
If you’ve been a perpetual lurker… lurk no more ya big chicken.

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{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }

Leo April 16, 2007 at 9:53 pm

I was a lurker!
Here is why I keep coming back:
“So many of us are sitting at that great big T-intersection of life…. looking right, looking left… one foot on the brake, one on the accelerator, checking the mirror… not exactly sure what the heck we’re doin’.”
Absolutely right Craig! No other self improvement blogger writes like you.
Leo-Caransebes-Romania

Reply

Craig Harper April 16, 2007 at 10:30 pm

Hey Leo,

LURK NO MORE MY FRIEND!

If I can write thousands of words for you… you can write a few for me!

Well done.

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jen April 17, 2007 at 5:49 am

‘Living in the land of uncertainty only creates mediocrity, boredom and frustration.’

add depression to that too…

‘Sometimes (now perhaps) we need to (metaphorically) step out of our life, our situation, our reality, our relationships and our busy-ness…. get some distance, get some perspective, take some time and stop ‘doing’ until we can answer those tough questions.’

I am not a perpetual lurker – only been reading you for a few days – in the last three weeks I have done the above and I am already seeing the changes for the better. Your post encourages me to keep at it – alas bad habits die hard and so do bad relationships.

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JSP April 17, 2007 at 6:53 am

The hardest part for me to actually ‘escape’ and spend time sitting, listening, reading, seeing, feeling, hearing, (ME) was scheduling the time to actually get away. Unfortunately, I didn’t feel i could leave for 5 whole days by myself until my dear mum died and i was in a big hole myself. Then there was the monumental decision where to go???? Once i sent out a few ‘earth messages’ I was sent an opportunity to house sit a piece of heaven. Reading todays blog made me remember the journey i went on when i went ‘playing’ by myself. The whole experience created just as you said Craig – a more, incredible and amazing inner me. I recommend your readers also take up the challenge. THanks for tugging at our spirits Mr Harper.
—–just a chick from Melbourne Australia.

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Craig Harper April 17, 2007 at 7:51 am

Good for you Jen.

Keep at it and keep me (us) updated.

Cheers.

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Craig Harper April 17, 2007 at 7:52 am

Hello Lovely JSP.

Soooo much more than ‘just a chick’.

( )

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Hulda April 17, 2007 at 9:22 am

I agree with you completely. Why do we spend more time on a night out than on our future. Thank you for providing this clarity.
Hulda (ex-lurker)
Stockholm

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Craig Harper April 17, 2007 at 9:39 am

Hi Hulda,

welcome to the world of the non-lurker.. it’s fun sharing.

Keep it up and lurk no more my Swedish friend!

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Kathie April 17, 2007 at 12:46 pm

Hey Craig, didn’t know you had a blog! Saw mention of it on Des’ blog and the Aussie blogger list – wow! I made it. I had a goal a year ago to make the top 100 Aussie bloggers and I’ve done it! Thanks for the list – I’ll be sending more readers your way too.

Totally agree with you about getting clarity – focus is important and my husband and I do make sure we take time out (away from everything) on a regular basis, be still on occasion and spend time thinking and planning! Bless you.

Reply

Craig Harper April 17, 2007 at 1:34 pm

Hi Kathie,

congrats on making the list.
My Geeky off-sider Johnnie put it all together… he’s a gun.

Take care.

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jen April 17, 2007 at 8:26 pm

I only found your blog today so I don’t know that I could be a lurker here.

But this post resonated as I am at a crossroads. Obviously some thinking is required.

Reply

Craig Harper April 17, 2007 at 11:00 pm

Hi Jen,

maybe you stumbled over here for a reason.
Decision time…

Glad you said hi.

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Anonymous April 25, 2007 at 10:50 am

Hello Craig,

Thank you for your articles which I have been reading for months now. I appreciate your “tough love” approach. I have taken your advice to heart and have made a major improvement career-wise by sitting my professional exams – I am on the last one now. The only thing I have trouble with is that I seem only be able to focus on one goal at a time – which is probably good for studying – however, my physical health really needs attention but I can’t work up the desire to do anything about it. If I have free time…I study…my desire to pass is so strong. The rest of my time is spent working, and then after work, taking care of my very active two young boys…..SO much work! Logically, I know I should find the time for a quick walk around the block at least, but I don’t. Mind you, running after the kids should count as exercise but that doesn’t seem to be the case because I don’t feel better afterwards…I feel tired and uncomfortable. Craig, I will re-read your articles about health and try and work on my desire to feel better.

Girl from Bermuda :)

Reply

Craig Harper April 25, 2007 at 5:09 pm

Hello Girl from Bermuda,

keep going, you’re doing great!

Cheers.

ps. look after your body… it will be so greatful!

Reply

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