Giving Failure the Finger
Last Friday, we spoke about the idea of breaking our big-picture goals and dreams down into an ongoing series of short-term action plans. Okay, I spoke, you listened. Er, read. Anyway, that particular conversation opened a floodgate of feedback, commitments, promises and pledges to do different and create different. It was one of the biggest responses we’ve ever had to anything posted on this site.
The amazing level of reader input was not because the article was anything spectacular in terms of writing quality or inspirational content. No, the one hundred and forty-ish comments were the result of some serious button-pushing and identifying with the core message.
While negotiating the next four decades of your life might be a little overwhelming (at times), the practice of compartmentalising the long-term change process into four-week instalments is, for many of us, a more sensible, manageable and productive approach. And when I say manageable, I mean manageable from a mental and emotional perspective.
Manage your mind and you’ll manage your life.
Almost Getting the Job Done
It seems that many of us relate to the guy who has a habit of starting things he doesn’t finish. Constantly. And the girl who always loses motivation, focus and discipline two or three weeks into her transformational journey – even though this is the last time. Again. It’s clear that many of us have a history of starting things we don’t finish. And of going through peaks and troughs of motivation, commitment and productivity. Indeed, some of us have intended ourselves all the way to Frustration Central.
We are the Kings (and Queens) of ‘almost’.
Wanting, planning, intending and hoping (to change our reality) ain’t enough. Neither is knowing what to do. Those things don’t create results (on their own). Lasting change arises out of something a little more practical, logical and strategic.
Throwing in the Towel
I’m not being negative when I say that seven days into a process such as this, there would normally be a reasonable percentage of ’starters’ who have already thrown in the towel. And, yes, they will all have a very good reason. Just like they always do.
I hope you’re not in that group.
Success isn’t often easy, comfortable or convenient. Neither is lasting change. That’s why it’s so elusive. Far too many people want amazing rewards without the appropriate effort; the prize without the work. They simply won’t do what it takes. They want the quick-fix, the short-cut, the magic pill. I hope you’re not in that group either.
If last week’s commitments are anything to go by, then this week we should see around one hundred and forty progress reports come rolling in. Or thereabouts.
Invariably, success or failure with any long-term change strategy will come back to your ability to control the cerebral minefield that is your mind. I’m here today to tell you that you’re good enough, talented enough and smart enough. I’m also here to tell you that when it comes to success, you don’t deserve it; you earn it.
Start earning.
Okay, you people who made a commitment last week, it’s time for your first update. Start typing. For the rest of you, feel free to leave a comment.
My 28-Day Update:
My commitment for the twenty-eight days was to stretch for thirty minutes daily. I have done what was required every day except Tuesday this week. At five-thirty on Tuesday night, I was called in to host the evening show on SEN radio (on air from 7-11), as the normal presenter (Mark) was sick. I didn’t arrive home until after midnight and the net result was that I missed my stretching. Slack, I know. Wednesday morning I stretched for forty-five minutes to (kind of) compensate. Other than that minor hiccup, I’m focused, committed and feeling loose as a goose.
GO HARPS!
Coaching Session Winner
On Tuesday, I asked the question “how do we change our default setting?” I gotta say, there was some incredible advice and I was a little overwhelmed with the quality of the responses. I genuinely appreciated the trouble that so many of you went to with your answers. Thanks.
Anyhoozle, Channelle, if you can email Johnnie your details, we’ll organise a time for some one-on-one coaching with me-dot-com. The irony of choosing someone to receive this (prize) was that the people who gave the best answers were probably those who least needed coaching. Imagine being penalised for being clever.
For that reason, I chose someone who (1) sent a great response and (2) might also benefit from some coaching.
Enjoy your weekend, keep doing what’s required, don’t over-think things and, yes, I’m talking to YOU!
Group Hug ( )





{ 1 trackback }
{ 154 comments… read them below or add one }
I like to control things and my individual goal was not to overreact to mundane troubles (as they say, xxxx happens!).
I am doing OK and I’ve even learnt a lesson in the process:
“When you can’t cope, delegate!”
I’ve tried and it has done me a world of good.
A happier me
1) Planning ahead (menus and shopping) – achieved. Ordered on day 1, delivered on day 3 when I got paid.
2) Not reaching for bread as a quick fix – achieved. I didn’t buy any bread this week. As a result I’ve only had 6 slices over the week as opposed to a whole loaf (sometimes more).
3) Staying away from petrol stations and corner shops – achieved 2 days out of 7. This one is a biggie for me. I’ve made a start, now to build on it.
4) Asking questions when the cravings hit – er … flunked this one.
5) Personal training session plus 2 x 30 min gym sessions – I did 1 x 40 minute gym session on Sunday afternoon and the personal training session on Tuesday early evening. On Sunday it was 15 mins bike, 15 mins treadmill and 10 mins cross trainer. On Tuesday I walked nearly 2 miles (about 3 km???) with my trainer. We stopped a few times on route to stretch out. I had planned on going to the gym yesterday (Wednesday) but my foot (plantar fasciitis) was so tender even though I blitzed it with ice for 20 mins and dusted off the anti-inflammatory gel after my PT session. I rested it for a day instead. Heading to the gym this afternoon (Thursday – UK time). Starting now, I’m ditching the treadmill and subbing with the rower as advised by my trainer. I’m also subbing pepsi max with diet coke.
Overall result: I lost 3.5 lbs (1.5 kg) this week. I was slimmer of the week at my slimming class too
Good to hear Anon N
Well done Helen…
I just want to get past my relative’s operation of bowel removal it is one thing to get setbacks but this has blown me out of the water, what if it has spread???? I can’t be positive ATM.
What’s with the Craig’s in this world? What stuff are you guys on and were can i get some?
I came across another inspiring and bald Craig.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4nJnNRM9tL4&feature=related
This guy got me off my butt.There really are no excuses.
ange-syd
My commitment was to stay away from lollies, chocolate, cakes and biscuits. And I have, even though for me it’s only been 4 days. It’s a great feeling to be in control of my mind, rather than the other way around. As an added benefit I’ve also exercised well and better this week.
My goal was to get back into a healthy sleep pattern. I have made the time to allow myself 8 hours sleep a night all bar 2 nights this week (I may have gotten a little distracted by my salsa dancing – oops). The actual sleeping of 8 consecutive hours is proving to be a little tougher as I think my body has gotten used to the rhythm of less sleep so still working on that one, baby steps as they say.
Hi Craig,
It really does work I have been on a new training program for the last 4wks, it’s structured day by day & have stuck to it.
I have noticed a change, l’m now in my next 4 week block which will be changing again.
I’m keen to see how I go in my next 4 wk program…
Have a great day!
Hugs
Charlotte
7 days down and I have managed to not only stare at my Berrylicious Tupperware water bottle but actually drink over 2 litres of water a day out of it. The loo is still my best friend. Does novelty wear off?! I can also say though, that after one week down, I feel better in the morning, no nasty cramping, my skin looks really bright and healthy and I actually feel a lot lighter. Bring on Week 2.
Have been talking inanely to whoever will listen…and have found out I’ve got the nickname “the incredible shrinking woman” ostensibly owing to all the weight I’ve lost over the last couple of years – that’s a compliment, I think. Can’t wait to get to the stage where I stop feeling like I’m going to have a heart attack every time I open my mouth! Thanks for the impetus, I should have started doing this years ago.
I’m still in!
I realized that a minimum of 30 minutes of exercise a day was too much when it came to the exercise bike (for now), so I’ve done 20 minutes on it for three days, and the other three days I hiked… probably an average of an hour each day. I did miss one day of exercise, but I didn’t kick myself over it. Just moved on.
I’ve only lost two of the six pounds I mysteriously gained the week prior to the challenge, but I’m okay with that, because I get that I’m not 20 anymore, and am no longer capable of dropping five pounds overnight.
I feel great… really sort of kick-buttish, you know?
Thank you again, Craig.
And congratulations to those of you who are hanging in… good work!
it’s Marit in Norway and here’s my update after 6 days: My lifestyle goals are more or less on track, I’ve done my regular workouts walking/running (4 times) and ST (1x) Food could be better, but I didn’t have too many cookies and I need more sleep too.
My committment in this challenge was to reorganize my basement and I’ve done the task I set out to do – 15 minute or one box – every day except Sunday. 4 boxes are gone and I’ll do another one (or two if I feel crazy!) today when I get home from work. I even found some things I’ve been looking for!!
The clutter in my basement is an assortment of books, old clothes, junk (to be repaired – haha) and inherited stuff from various relatives. A few boxes contain stuff laden with emotion. I have spent (too) many years living in apathy/depression. I’ve “woken up” to take care of myself now, but I’m still a little bit afraid of the emotions that might resurface when I go through those things. I tell myself I do feel so much better when I can LET GO, and I will keep at this until I’m done.
JOY!
In the next 21 days I’ll get to do at least 5 more hours of clearing out, which will bring me very close to the finish line. Just imagine that!
Hi guys,
My commitment was to learn something new every day for the next 28. This might sound easy and not take very much time and effort (like googling a random fact) but when it comes to learning something that will help me to develop as a person and increase knowledge in a broad range of ways thats not so easy. I have definitely stuck to my guns and i would say that at least 4-5 out of the 7 days i truly learnt something about myself, those around me, the country i live in and the world.
For example
- i found myself forgiving someone who had done me wrong in the past
- i did lots of exercise and learnt more about the way my body responds to exercise
- i had a conversation with a guy i work with from new zealand and learnt some interesting things about the way he was brought up in new zealand
- i started reading a history book of australia
- and i had an interesting conversation with my mum about the upcoming australian election.
I felt really pleased and uplifted after experiencing each one of these knowlege improvement experiences and will try and improve in the week to come.
Cheers
I am on track – my goal is to change my attitude about money and to be more responsible and live within my means. I have been able to track all spending and all income and I am feeling better just for knowing the detail and not burying my head in the sand.
Cheers
I umm, sucked the big one this week…
I exercised for 30 mins only four of the planned 6 days. Work was crazy – but isn’t it always? Actually I think not keeping my commitment to myself and you lovely people and then reporting back honestly has been good for me. I always tell the baby lawyers to take care of yourself because nobody will do it for you, but I don’t follow my own advice.
I am going to Wales for a weekend of hiking and am determined not to let work overtake me next week.
Bek
I have continued to meet my goal of continuing to park across the street from work and walk to my office and back each day, despite the heat and humidity. It’s a habit now and one that I don’t even really think about anymore, just part of the routine. So I think I will add a more challenging goal, which will be to eat healthy past Wednesday of each week, as my healthy eating plans tend to go out the window by Thursday or Friday as the weekend approaches.
I didn’t post any new commitments up here last week.
Awesome job on all who have!
I will note one thing that has been a barrier for me. I guess at some points I have resented my Mum, my sister and others whom I think I have trained harder than/more often than during my life. I would say that assumption is true, (but sis is catching up). Also I have gone through times with a controlled clean diet, (so I always told myself I did well there) – and as in the mindset I enjoyed it.
But the thing is if not on the ball……………I’ve been known as a guts, off track, yoyoing and find it embarrassing to have a body fat percentage higher than anyone in my family. This is despite my hard work, enjoyable at the time. Pity I undo it! Parents are more moderation people food wise/they keep active by housework and some walking. Not into intensive cardio or weights though like me if I train when on track.
I’ve thought about it. I guess if you Craig Harper or Craig Alexander or Michelle Bridges stopped training initially to take a week off and indulge in a few foods they wouldn’t normally eat it that would be fine. But if they got a taste for the lazy lifestyle and decided to put off their normal routine for another week they could really start feeling sluggish, then feel annoyed at themselves, addicted to junk, putting off getting back on track, hating themselves with excess fat etc. In 8 months it is possible they could put on as much as 30kg fat, be accustomed to the couch and less fit than me, Mum or Dad. And feeling angry cause up till 8 months ago they put so much work into where they were at, more than all these people who keep a slightly above average fitness level through moderate consistent work and it’s not visible now!!!
Also sports players are often only said to be as good as their last performance.
If someone works/saves hard for 10 years to amass $150 000, feels proud, – if they have a mental lapse, go on a few holidays, buy junk, party up, buy designer clothes then put on 30kg it is possible they could go into debt quick despite all their previous hard work then feel awful.
So………no matter the situation I guess it is always our responsibility to keep ourselves on top of our game, to a level we are happy with if we don’t want our hard work to evaporate into distant memories that only we seem to remember about!
Love it! I nearly ‘accidentally ate a hamburger’ yesterday then thought of you C2 – damn it, you are still in my head!
Made a decision that I would actually follow my Physio’s instructions and funny thing happened, it been working?!
Not such a good report, but I will report!
I did my stretching one night and no core work.
Promise to do better this week.
OK, 7 day report in.
Recap 28 days of eating primal.
I will confess that our team did have a baby shower on Tuesday for one of the guys whose wife was about to have their second child. So there was cake & yes I had a piece, I know not very primal. But cake at work isn’t common & he was very excited about the fact it was going to be a boy.
However the rest of the week completely spot on, including takeaways & eating out I was still able to stay primal. It did raise questions, as to why I wasn’t eating items on my plate that I forgot to get the waiter to leave off.
There is a farewell afternoon tea today at work, but I’ll be staying primal for that. Which will probably mean not eating anything, but that’s OK. It’s a great time to catch up with people so I’m usually too busy talking.
My commitment was to continue the positive changes in relation to exercise and food, I have made in my life over the recent weeks and to not let the dodgy me step in with excuses. Well the dodgy me stepped in Monday in regards to exercise, I think the excuse was something like the fact I had had a very busy day, work, kids etc got home late and basically couldn’t be bothered!
However on the positive side I have stuck to the positive exercise routine every other day this week (min 40 mins each) and have eaten really well. As a result the scales were 1.1kg lighter Yay me!! Now the trick is to stay focused.
I pledged last week that I would start and follow my triathlon training programme. Done! Not exactly as written, but everything was covered.
My pledge for the next week is to a) continue on with the programme and b) have a cooked dinner every night, rather than a chocolate bar.
Thanks for this challenge guys. Reading Craig’s email this morning made me realise that I was planning on blowing off my training tomorrow – not anymore!!
all the best
Mel
My goal for the 28 days was to finally get to 65kgs (chasing it for a decade!) which meant i needed to lose 2.5kgs. I lost 1kg this week and am now the closest i have ever been to the elusive 65kgs! I commited to doing at least 30 mins of exercise 6 days a week which i did. I did also say i was going to only eat one sugary treat a week-while a few more did sneak in this past week, lets see how we go this week as it does feel great to be sooo close to my goal!!!!
Hug for you Michael