A bit of fun today so don’t take it too seriously…
One of my friends is currently exploring the world of online-dating. With some pretty interesting observations, experiences and results. I think she’s a brave woman. Without giving away her identity (I’ve been warned), it’s fair to say that, for this particular person – who happens to be a divorced mother working long hours in the corporate world – the online dating model seems to be a convenient, practical and logical place to start. In theory, it’s a great idea. Makes total sense.
Practically… well, that’s another story.
It seems that, when it comes to the matter of describing and displaying the… er… aah… product(?) on the relevant websites, some blokes are over-promising and under-delivering. To say the least. In fact, if my friend is to be believed, almost every bloke in the date-osphere (I made that word up) is committing some kind of cyber-fraud by representing themselves with ten year-old photos (or older) and personal profiles that are largely works of fiction. To this point in time her dating experiences have ranged from scary, to hilarious, to creepy to amazing.
And not amazing in a good way.
And I’m not talking about two or three dates with a few random weirdos. No, she’s been on more than a dozen dates over the last four months so her ‘sample’ group is a reasonably large one. On behalf of all the relatively normal, mildly dysfunctional, slightly chubby, slightly insecure males of the world, I felt compelled to make an apology to her. I clumsily tried to convince her that not all blokes are frauds. Although considering her experience, I totally understand her very low expectations, skepticism and sense of frustration.
I Don’t Get It
Personally, I don’t get it. I don’t get why blokes (or women, for that matter) do it. Why put up completely misrepresentative information and pictures when it will most probably result in disappointment, resentment and awkwardness? If not, downright anger? Do these guys think that when they finally meet in person their awesome personality and charisma will somehow distract their date from the physical reality of the fatter, older, uglier fraud sitting before them?
“And by the way Jane, I’m not really an astronaut.”
Good grief men. Get a grip.
While it might seem like a good idea to pump oneself up (to a prospective date), any decent sale’s training will teach you that to over-promise and under-deliver is the quickest way to damage your brand, alienate your target market and create disconnection.
Not to mention, make yourself look like a dick.
Of course, I’m no expert in the world of cyber-dating (or any dating, for that matter) but I do think it might be wise to portray one’s wares in a realistic and authentic light. And while I don’t think I’ll ever travel the cyber-dating road myself, if I was to, I think my plan would be to publish an underwhelming personal profile with a not-very-flattering photo.
Under promise, over-deliver.
That way I don’t have to see the disappointment on their face.