Life After Death (or Perhaps Not)

Hi Guys, CJ here… hope you’re enjoying your week. What’s-his-name is having the day off today so you’ve been lumped blessed with me.

Celestial Travel

Up until a year or so ago, I was very certain about what would happen to me after I died. Not, like, immediately after although I’m hoping that my family will choose something flattering for me to wear and someone will remember that I do not want to be cremated – not after I saw that awful James Bond film where 007 is (almost) burned alive. I had nightmares for weeks after watching that. Yikes. No, I’m talking about what happens to the part that isn’t my body. You know, the bit that is, well, me. That is, if there is a bit that isn’t my body. Hmmm. Aaah, I love to explore the easy topics, don’t I? Especially as we all have the same ideas about this stuff.

The way I used to see it, my journey to the ‘other side’ was as predictable and inflexible as a travel itinerary for an ‘If It’s Tuesday This Must Be Belgium’ European coach tour. It was almost like my church was a travel agency and if I paid my dues I would be granted a seat (pending availability, of course). But, now, I’m not quite so convinced. Actually, at the moment the only thing I know for certain is that I know nothing for certain when it comes to the “what happens once we die” stuff. I thought I did but over the last year or three it’s dawned on me that (for a range of convenient reasons) I simply adopted the beliefs of those around me. In fact, I’m not sure I ever really had my own revelation or epiphany.

Epiphany-less CJ… sigh.

Choose Your Retirement Plan

From prehistoric times (meaning, literally, before recorded history) human beings have sought to explain and predict what happens after we die. Most cultures and religions have some kind of belief system whereby the non-physical element of the deceased (call it spirit, soul, essence, being) moves on to somewhere else.

The ‘somewhere else’ does, of course, differ dramatically between the various cultures and religions. The Ancient Egyptians, for example, believed that the dead would live again in the ‘Fields of Yalu’ – as long as they had been properly mummified, remembered the appropriate spells from the Book of the Dead and had a sinless heart that was as light as a feather. Sheeesh. No pressure.

Other religions teach that souls go to heaven in its various forms as long as the would-be saints meet the strict entry requirements. And, of course, those who don’t will spend eternity in a lake of fire. No pressure there either.

Still others believe in reincarnation. Hinduism, for example, is incredibly detailed and specific about life after death and the reincarnation process. Would it be terribly shallow of me to want to come back as Scarlett Johansson?

Okay, okay, just checking.

As I said, I have no idea what I believe anymore so I’m not making any judgements as to which religion, belief system, theory or culture is the most feasible (although I probably won’t be tearing up the bedsheets for my mummification any time soon). Nevertheless, it’s fairly clear that although most human beings believe in some form of an afterlife, they can’t all be correct about the details.

The Need to Believe

When I was seventeen, I saw a dead person for the first (and only) time. I was shocked that he looked so indisputably dead. Not sleeping. Not pretending. Not like in the movies. Just sadly and simply dead. Something had gone.

We can either believe that the ‘something’ which had given that body life, which had animated it (in the truest sense of the word) has been extinguished forever or we can believe that it still exists but it has gone somewhere else.

To many of us, the first option – that our physical death is all there is, thanks for coming, no more, all over red rover, end of the line – is unfathomable. Especially when we are saying goodbye to someone we love. In some respects, it is braver to believe in the ‘that’s all there is’ theory because it offers no comfort to the grieving. There is no consolation: no ‘we’ll meet again in a better place’; no reassurance that our departed loved ones are watching us from heaven or elsewhere. Nothing.

It is perhaps unsurprising, then, that so many of us choose to believe in some form of afterlife. To me, the thought of there being ‘nothing’ post-death is beyond comprehension. Or maybe it’s beyond my comfort threshold. I simply cannot imagine not existing. But then, maybe I don’t want to.

Does It Really Matter?

I remember watching a sit-com a few years ago where the husband had secretly sold his half of the side-by-side burial plots that his wife had bought for their eternal rest. She found out and she was furious. His defense was that he had figured that if she died first she would never find out and if he died first he couldn’t care less that she was angry. Clever man.

I’ve heard many, many people argue about what we can expect in the afterlife. If ever there was a pointless argument, surely that’s it. In fact, I have spent much of my life in the middle of religiosity so it can be a tricky thing for me to separate the programming, the experiences and people’s expectations (of me), from what I learn to be true – away from the influences and pressures – all by myself. Some of you know what I’m saying here.

Apparently, it’s important to be right about this stuff. Which, to me, is a little puzzling. Surely what I think and predict is fairly insignificant in the whole scheme of things. If, for example, I took a trip to Norway but I had mistakenly believed that it was a tropical paradise, would Norway be at all affected? Would Norway care? Okay, they might laugh at little when I have to wear a bikini in the snow but other than that I don’t think there would be a huge impact on downtown Oslo. I’m thinking that if we are right about the afterlife then that’s great but if we are wrong we are probably going to be unaware of our mistake anyway.

Or maybe I’m completely missing the point.

Living Life as a Prelude

Perhaps the importance of our afterlife belief system lies not so much in how it will affect us after death (if at all) but how it affects us now. Because, to some extent, many people allow their afterlife predictions (expectations, beliefs) to have a significant (if not, over-riding) impact on how they live their lives. Which can be a great thing or a not-so-great thing depending on your perspective and the ‘rules’ to which you must comply.

Some people joyfully make positive contributions to the world because they believe that it is their role to serve and that after death they will be held accountable for (and hopefully rewarded for) their deeds. Other people will endure untold (and often unnecessary) misery because they believe their rewards will come not during this life but after it – happiness in life is sadly sacrificed for paradise after death (him-dot-com touched on this recently).

For some people, their afterlife belief system not only influences their lives but determines their lives. They invest so much time and emotional energy into their religion that the suggestion that they could quite possibly be wrong is incomprehensible – it is, understandably, far too confronting for them.  Because, to adjust their beliefs about the afterlife would (perhaps) necessitate a complete shift in their thinking about this life.

Of course, there are also many people who believe that there is nothing at all after death but they are kind, generous, honest, happy and gorgeous people anyway.

Always With You

Perhaps the most interesting aspect of the afterlife discussion is not so much the incongruous variety of theories but what all of them together can illustrate about human nature. The fact that we have such a range of theories demonstrates that many of us need to make sense out of the nonsensical. We need to find meaning and purpose in the seemingly random, unfair, inequitable and often indiscriminate nature of death.

But, mostly, I think it demonstrates our capacity to love. Our love for our friends and family is so strong that (for many of us) we like (need) to believe that they must always exist, somehow or somewhere. Perhaps it is naïve but at the same time, it’s comforting. And, of course, if we are wrong we’ll never know. Right?

Looking forward to hearing your thoughts. Remember, there are no right or wrong answers here (or if there are we won’t know for a while yet ), just opinions respectfully expressed.

CJ xox

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