There’s always a next question. Your next question.
And it’s often the question you ask after a less-than-desirable event, outcome or experience that will be life-shaping if not, life-changing. At the very least, it will influence your mood, focus, energy, decision making and the likelihood of you moving forward in a positive and productive way. From a ‘building your best life’ perspective, clearly there are better and worse questions to ask.
Some people are problem focused: Why does bad stuff always happen to me?
Some are full of self-pity: Why doesn’t anyone understand me?
Some are driven by ego: Don’t they understand how special I am?
Some are resentful: Why does she get all the attention and accolades?
The Why Behind the Why
When it comes to your questions and the impact they might have on your life, it’s the why behind the why that matters. Why are you asking that question? What’s your motive? Is it really about finding a solution, learning something, gaining insight and creating a better result or is it about something else? As a rule, better questions produce better decisions, behaviours and thankfully, better results.
When you ask great questions with great intent, you immediately change your state. From negative to positive. Hopeless to hopeful. Irrational to logical. Problem-obsessed to solution-focused. Self-pity to self-empowerment. Stagnation to momentum. Reactive to proactive.
Notice that none of the above questions (in grey) are asked from a perspective of humility, awareness or genuinely wanting to learn, grow and evolve. They all come out of some negative place. In short, not one question is solution-focused. When you look for problems and dramas, you will find them. In life, more often than not, your next question will determine where you focus your mind, energy and potential. It will also determine what you do with what you’ve been given.
So, what’s your next question?