Role Models

Hi Guys, CJ here. Long time no chat. I’ve missed ya’ll a little. Hope you’ve been good, if not, good at it.

Smashing Through the Glass Ceiling

Whilst it would barely rate a mention in the international media, the big news in this neck of the woods recently has been the appointment of Australia’s first female Prime Minister. Yep, our very first chick PM. Don’t worry, I’m not going to discuss politics because, frankly, I’d rather endure another round of ‘painless’ hair removal from you-know-where. However, what really interests me about this development is some people’s reaction to it.

I have heard many women (and men) say that it’s great because now our young girls can grow up knowing that it is possible for them to become the leader of this country. What? It has been possible for years. In fact, Australia elected its first female representative to federal parliament in 1921.

Really, nothing has changed except our perception of what’s possible. A (perceived) barrier has been broken. Because when one person reaches an unprecedented level of achievement (in sports, politics, arts, business etc), our idea of ‘normal’ can change forever.

Perhaps this is one reason why it is so important to have positive role models in our lives. Clearly, not all of us can become Prime Minister, Olympic champions or award-winning novelists. However, we can use their stories to motivate and inspire us to achieve our best, to change our self-limiting beliefs and to explore our (mostly-unexplored) potential.

Position Vacant: Role Model

Sometimes our role models can come into our lives unexpectedly. One of my role models is Craig Harper. No, I don’t want his biceps or his fashion sense but there are aspects of Craig’s personality and his approach to life that I aspire to develop in myself. It could take some time

I know this sounds like a suck-job, it’s not. He actually hates it when I praise him publicly. Suck it up Mr Harper.

He would be the first to admit, though, that he is not perfect; he is flawed and human like all of us. We cannot expect one person to encapsulate everything we want to be. We need to still be us (because trying to be someone else cannot make us happy – trust me on that one) but be humble and smart enough to adopt one or two characteristics from the variety of role models available to us.

Our role models could be famous people who have accomplished great things (Dr Catherine Hamlin, Nick Vujicic, Gandhi) or they could be people a little closer to home. We might be inspired by Michelle’s bravery, Rachel’s aura of calm or Loretta’s determination. Sometimes our role models may even be our own children (but don’t hold your breath on that one).

Look, Listen and Learn

When we have a specific goal that we would like to achieve, it can be useful to seek a role model who has a great track record in that area. I have been very fortunate to have found a number of role models who give me guidance and inspiration as I stumble my way through the mildly-terrifying world of stand-up comedy. Comedy is a very much ‘learn-as-you-go’ thing, so receiving advice and feedback from working comedians is the fastest way for me to improve.

Of course, we can’t always speak to our role-models (especially if they’re inconveniently dead  – so selfish of them) but reading autobiographies and biographies can also be helpful. We can discover what obstacles the person overcame: gain an insight into the beliefs and attitudes that helped them persevere and find practical lessons to help us achieve our goals.

Getting to ‘know’ someone before they were famous, successful and ‘amazing’ is what inspires me the most. To know that they endured similar (or often, much more difficult) challenges than me, is what makes me believe that almost anything is possible when I stop allowing my fear and ego to get in the way of my potential (as you-know-who is constantly telling us).

Perhaps, though, the true value of a role model is to inspire, motivate and empower you and me to greatness. Not so much to ‘teach’ specifics or to be an instructor.  I have no interest in cycling but I can still be inspired and uplifted by Lance Armstrong’s achievements. Witnessing success in any field can give us the push we need to try harder in our own. If we let it. We may experience an internal shift; a stretching of the boundaries of what we believe is possible for us. We might see old things in new ways.

A Piece of Cake

Unless they’re people close to us, most of our role models will only come to our attention once they have already become successful. Often it’s only their mum (and, perhaps, their bank manager) who has a full understanding of what they have been through to get to that point.

Because they make it look so easy, we can be forgiven for thinking that it, well, is. Apparently, one of the most common mistakes a novice comedian can make is to watch a successful comedian interacting with the audience and believe that he or she can do the same. By lunch tomorrow. They don’t understand that the comedian is drawing on years of experience and, therefore, has a treasure-trove of jokes and comebacks at his or her disposal. Watching an underprepared newby comedian silently waiting for the adlib fairies to bless him with his next joke is not a pretty sight – and those skinny microphone stands are pretty hard to hide behind. I should know. Damn.

Many people sit in the audience at Craig’s seminars and (because he, too, makes it look so easy) think “I reckon I could do that”. Which is great. And maybe they could. Maybe they would be awesome. But they need to be prepared to put in the work that he has put in, to go through the learning process that he has gone through in order to reach that point. Unsurprisingly, not many people are willing to do that.

Yes, we need role models. Yes, it’s smart and healthy to want to adopt certain attributes of the people whom we admire but we also need to appreciate their whole journey, not just their current (seemingly cushy) situation.

Who Me? Yes, You.

Have you ever considered the possibility that you are probably already a role model for someone? Yes, you. You don’t have to be famous or the ‘best’ in order to inspire those around you. There would be (at least) one thing that you do well that others would like to emulate.

Remember, as the Big Guy says, you don’t have to wait until you have ‘all your shit together’ before you can contribute to the lives of those around you. You don’t even have to be a leader in a formal sense. Sometimes you can be a role model by being collaborative and helpful – by being the best ‘you’ that you can be.

So …

Who are your role models? Why do you admire them? What have you learnt from them?

Can’t wait to hear your thoughts.

CJ xox

P.S. Bicep Boy (you know; him-dot-com) told me to tell you that he will announce the winner of this week’s comp (or whatever it is), tomorrow (Friday). Someone’s in for a treat!