Hi Guys…
Hope you’re well and being the change you want to see in your world. I apologise for being a little scarce recently, my world away from the blogosphere has been somewhat demanding. How dare life get in the way of our flourishing cyber-relationship.
Today’s instalment is not so much a life lesson or motivational rev-up (as such) as it is me thinking out loud about my ‘job’. I thought you might find it interesting as it will give you a little insight into how I think when I’m going about the process of speaking and writing. I’m often asked about my writing style (some might say lack of style) and how it evolved. This post will give you an idea.
The other day I met a bloke (for the first time) who is a regular reader of this site. I was out having a coffee with a friend and the guy recognised me. Or, he may have recognised the me-dot-com shirt. Anyhoozle, he decided to say “hello”. Part of the conversation went something like this:
Hey Craig…
“Hey Craig, cool site (giving me a thumbs-up sign from two tables away).”
“Thanks, I’m glad you like it.”
“I get your emails every day and forward a lot of them on to my friends (he stands and walks over to our table).”
I stand, ask him his name and shake his hand.
“What do you like about the site?”
I know that question sounds like I’m fishing for a compliment but I’m not. I’m genuinely interested to know what people like (and don’t like) about the site so that I can make it a better resource and gain more insight into my readers. That is, who reads and why.
“I like the lack of cheese.”
“What does that mean?”
“I like the fact that you don’t sound like a motivational-guru-type when you write.”
“Oh really, how do they sound?”
“You know: cheesy.”
“Cheesy?”
“Yeah, fake and smarmy. I hate the bullshit, the sales pitches and the cheesy language they use.”
“And how do I talk?”
“Not like that. Like someone who’s normal. A regular bloke. Like me.”
“Thanks.”
“I don’t normally get into the motivation (type) stuff but my missus kept shoving your articles under my nose and eventually you wooed me into your web (laughs). I thought she was into some kind of cult for a while – until I started reading your stuff for myself.” (laughs)
“Well, I’m not officially launching the cult until next year.”
“I’m in.” (more laughs)
We spoke for another minute or so, I measured him for his cult kaftan (and Ugg Boots) and I rejoined my friend.
I’ve heard that message (or similar) many times before. Not the part about me, the other part. The part about what people don’t like about motivational speakers and the field of personal development in general.
The Challenge
One of the biggest challenges in doing what I do is that many (and I mean m-a-n-y) people are not particularly receptive to anything that looks, smells or sounds remotely like personal development or self-help. Especially Aussies. Which can make my job a little challenging from time to time. I’ve spoken in many countries and, in my experience, Australian audiences are (often) the least trusting and the hardest to connect with in a short space of time. So, the question I ask myself often is:
Q. How do I be a successful personal development speaker and writer without actually sounding like one?
Your thoughts?
My greatest challenge in writing for this site, writing books and working as a professional speaker has always been (and continues to be) finding the best way to deliver my information, ideas and lessons in a manner that creates optimal connection, understanding, inspiration and shift (change) without the er… cheese.
It seems many Australians (like the guy in the café) come with an inbuilt cheese alarm. Or, as my mother might say: a bullshit detector.
The Folded Arm Fraternity
While some audiences are very receptive and open, I have worked with numerous groups where (to start with) the vibe was somewhat less than enthusiastic. To say the least. When you’re confronted with a sea of crossed legs, folded arms and stern-looking faces (before you’ve spoken a single word), you know it’s gonna be an interesting morning. This is often the case when a group of employees have been wheeled into an auditorium to listen to some ‘tool’ (me) that the company has employed to boost team morale, to motivate the masses and to talk about some kind of work-life balance crap. Or something.
Many Aussies are distrusting, skeptical and (often) critical when it comes to anything or anyone that looks like they’re pushing the self-help barrow. Even if they personally know nothing of the book, the program, the speaker or the information.
Here’s a version of a conversation I’ve had many times:
“That self-help stuff is all mumbo-jumbo.”
“Why do you say that?”
“It just is.”
“Oh.”
“And that Tony Robbins bloke is a big dickhead.”
“Really? Have you heard him speak?”
“Wouldn’t waste my money or time.”
“Oh, have you read any of his books?”
“Nope.”
“Well, I’ve heard him speak and read lots of his stuff. He’s pretty smart and has some interesting things to say.”
“Well..I… er…”
“So, what is it that you don’t like about his philosophy?”
“What?”
“You know: his philosophy – the stuff he teaches – what don’t you like about it?”
“Er…”
“So, what is it that you don’t like about him?”
“What?”
“You said he’s a dickhead, why do you say that?”
“Well… take a look at him…”
“So, it’s his appearance you don’t like then?”
“I hate everything about him”
“Like…?”
“His annoying voice…”
“So, you hate the way he looks and sounds but you don’t actually know anything about his program, ideas or philosophy?”
The person in this conversation is more typical than you might think.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m also of the opinion that there are plenty of personal development frauds who shouldn’t be trusted. Sure, we’re all selling something. I sell books, CDs, DVDs and a range of programs but I never coerce, twist arms up backs or “sell” anything. To be honest, I’m often criticised by certain (well-meaning) people in my world because I don’t market myself aggressively enough. Whatever that means. If this website is never anything more than a free resource that in some small way, helps you make your life a better place to be, that’s totally cool with me. 
Back on Topic..
The interesting thing is that, quite often, the people who are most in need of a little er… ‘personal growth’ (aren’t we all?) are the ones who are the least receptive, the least open and the most critical. Have you experienced this? And I’m not just talking about being open to personal development (as such), I’m talking about being receptive to anything that might lead to some kind of positive change in their world: theology, philosophy, meditation, counseling, psychotherapy, performance coaching or (even) personal training.
So, for the past four years the development of this site has been a labour of love, learning and listening.
Connecting with Laughs
I realised early on my journey that (many) Aussies respond to humour and a little self-deprecation from the bloke (or chick) up the front. Somewhere along the way we’ve learned that “If he can put himself down and make us laugh then he can’t be that bad and maybe we can trust him.” If I walk onto a stage (in this country) and straight away start with the ‘transformational language’ and the ‘motivator-dude’ speak, most audiences will switch off within minutes.
Instant disconnection.
If, on the other hand, I begin my presentation with an amusing story (which somehow makes me look like an idiot) that simultaneously makes the audience laugh, sparks their interest and opens the door to an interesting discussion, then I have instant engagement.
While humour is only a small component of professional speaking and writing (unless you’re a comic), it certainly has a way of opening doors (emotionally), breaking down barriers (mentally) and creating a tangible shift of energy in a room. It can even change physiology: frowns become smiles, folded arms start to unfold, heads begin to nod and happy hormones are produced.
As long as there’s no cheese involved. Of course.
Thankfully, I’m still on my journey, still learning and still growing as a writer, speaker and teacher. Clearly, I have a way to go.
So, I’d love to hear your thoughts on this topic. Do you have a bullshit detector or a cheese alarm? What communication style works best for you? Was there a time when you were resistant to what you actually needed to hear? What do you like and dislike about the field of personal development? How can the ‘motivational-types’ be more effective at what they do? Feel free to be open and honest but don’t use the names or individuals or organisations – we don’t wanna ruffle feathers. Or end up in court. 
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{ 30 comments… read them below or add one }
Yep, Australians love a bit of humour. But for me I think your way of opening a presentation with an amusing story isn’t just about “If he can put himself down and make us laugh then he can’t be that bad and maybe, we can trust him”. You connect to everyone as a real person first, motivational speaker second, the humour is a bonus. I personally would think that the speaker could have a conversation with me rather than just speak at me.
I have been “herded” into many seminars throughout my career, some more engaging than others. Depending on how the company sets the event up, you can certainly feel like you are part of a corporate process all the way down to the inevitable feedback forms. Quite often the environment is intimidating and formal (let’s talk about typical hotel seminar rooms – generally located in the bowels of a hotel, rarely have windows and set up with the standard tables draped with tablecloths – it is very sedentary and screams of mediocrity, the very thing we want to rise above!)
The corporates usually assume that everyone in the group has the same learning style.
For those of us who are action learners, or those who like to absorb and then explore info, it can be a tough few hours! The fast moving, never stop for a breath, perfectly timed speakers, come across as slick.
The most rewarding session I have ever experienced was one that was a balance of guidance/education, exercise and individual goal setting run by an NLP master/yoga teacher. It was a dynamic few hours. And yes, the main goal I set was all about how I wanted to live my life, and I wake up every day and work at it. ( well, there are some crap days when I’m less than committed)
So after all that – maybe the corporates could ask their staff how they would best like to learn. Personally, I would be happier to be with a group running in the rain with you and stopping for a discussion under a tree along the way. Just walking away from a session with one actionable idea is fantastic.
This wouldn’t suit everyone, so let’s have some choice. I can’t do another seminar with the white tablecloths and bowl of Minties!
“I can’t do another seminar with the white tablecloths and bowl of Minties!”
So true Karen and so typical.
As a former primary teacher and as a lifelong learner and educator could I say the learning is in the stories you tell? I know with my classes that they may not remember the Maths we did that day but they will remember the story I told them about something funny one of my own boys did.
With craigharper.com I don’t always remember all the blog entries (even though they are fantastic) but it is the stories that stick with me and the images they create – like the poor teenaged fat kid perched on the side of the pool with no shirt on and that same kid going running in long pants and not the right shoes.
So all in all, I think at least beginning with a story and then weaving as many into your presentation as you can will make it more memorable. I remember many in-service presentations I attended as a teacher but the ones I could come home and talk about were the ones where I could come home and re-tell stories.
Hi Craigo,
I would say most Aussies definitely have a bullshit detector … I know I have, I’d like to think not many bullshitters get through. And like the guy in your little story – I HATE ”smarmy”. Sadly there’s plenty of smarm out there, especially in the field of personal development. It’s hard to separate the shit from the really good stuff.
After stumbling across your website 53 years ago, I’m still here (is that sad??). So, I would say I’m pretty receptive to your teaching style. Also … I clearly have some deep-seated problems!!!
Mind you, there’s been many a time I didn’t want to read (or hear) what you had to say.
That’s why I like you. You say it anyway.
Em
( ) x
Yep, there was a time when I wasn’t open to the message I needed to hear, possibly because of that Aussie ‘knocker’ culture that distrusts anything ‘out of the norm’ (whatever defines that?).
I actually remember about 21/2 years ago when I nearly clicked right past this site. I saw the words ‘motivational speaker’ and thought ‘oh, no not another one of those guys’….luckily I stopped long enough to read one post called Your Creative Self which really resonated with me, big time. (I also stopped here because of your smiling face in the header, Craig..true, I did!)
Anyhow, since then I’ve probably read…er, about 600 or so posts… amazing (that you’ve written that many, not that I’ve read that many)!
And in the time that I’ve been reading I’ve – lost weight, become a gym and nutrition junkie, written a book (REFRAME WEIGHTLOSS) and now I’m writing my own blog.
In short, I’ve now become ‘one of those motivational types’ myself.
Now, I can’t help but encourage other people, wishing they could learn the lessons I have, wishing they would read a Tony Robbins book (or a Wayne Dyer or Richard Carlson ), wishing they could live their life more fully. I’m not very good at sharing these things on a one to one basis, but I expressed it all in the book I wrote and hope to share my lessons through it. Just today a few new friends asked me how I came to write a book. I told them the above story about being a Craig Harper ‘follower’ (still waiting for my Kaftan, btw, do they come in blue?) and how much of an encourager and motivator Craig is. I also told them a little story about a post you wrote on procrastination……amazing how many knowing smiles and nods the word ‘procrastination’ creates. Anyways, it had me thinking about how many ‘things’ people would do if they were er….more motivated.
Everyone it seems would do ‘something’ if they could one day ‘get around to it’.
So my final point is…..I think the whole world would benefit more by listening to motivational speakers but unfortunately there definetely is this cultural thing, that says ‘it’s all mumbo jumbo’. It’s not though – it’s about being more fully alive, it’s about using your own unique gifts and abilities and it’s about helping to make the world a better place, which we can all do if we change just a few of our cynical negative behaviours and habits and start looking for the good.
Gosh, I’f better stop typing and get off my soapbox now.
I’ll being checking the mailbox for my blue kaftan Craig, but will keep reading even if it doesn’t arrive.
Ciao everyone.
Love,
Mon ( )
Hello Craig! Maybe u’ve forgotten dat u also have some international followers? Am a nigerian u stumbled on your site one day. The messages are real and always touching d core of my being. That is why I keep checking your blog.
Something that I love (that I also love this site for) is the tell it how it is, no sugar coating beating around the bush crap.
I strongly dislike the fakers just trying to make a quick buck out of people. It’s something that really gets my goat – and especially when they are making that buck off people who are genuinely seeking help but don’t necessarily have great connections/information to do so and so they end up getting sold the bullshit. Thankfully I haven’t had a personal horror story experience but I’ve heard plenty of them, as I’m sure have many others. Having said that though, I think that it is becoming a much more openly discussed subject, not just as a topic, but people’s personal experiences, what has inspired them, let them down or taught them how to make real and lasting change in their life (whether or not they utilise that info can be another story, but hey, not the point this minute! lol). I think it’s awesome that more people are readily launching themselves on their own better development journeys and are willing and open to sharing their journey with others as I hope (possibly quite naively) that this will help stamp out a little of the fakers or at the very least, not let one idiot stop their journey. Though I’m not sure if that’s just because my friendship circles have changed as I have changed of if the perception of personal development has changed or both?? Lol
I like when the motivational types keep themselves human and don’t profess to be perfect and have all the answers but can share their mistakes and learnings, things that move and/or inspire them and things that just did not go right on a continual basis – because no matter how far you have come on your own journey, it’s nice to be reminded that sometimes we all still just feel like beginners and that’s ok too because at the end of the day we are all human.
Oh, and just for the record Craig – you are great at being human with us
I guess I have my own “bull-shit” detector on most of the time. I was just telling a friend in an email that a lot of the so-called spiritual community in my area of the world have really big egos (my opinion) and just aren’t real so I don’t follow them. It surprises me that a lot of people seem to see me as a person who could easily get drawn into a cult. They often see me as gullible when that is not true at all. I will follow a teacher as long as he/she is offering what I need and is traveling the direction that I need to go in. As soon as they step onto another path or cross my personal line of ethics, I am out of there. I don’t blindly follow anybody. I never have. I never will. I have lost several spiritual teachers for just that reason. I listen to my inner voice and I do see what is pretty obvious, at least to me, when a person is no longer being real. That is one of the gifts of being an incest survivor – I don’t blindly follow anyone. I question everything.
Craig, your stories do make you real. That is why I subscribe to your blog. 12-Step programs have taught me to always “Take what you like and leave the rest.”
I’m an Aussie (like most of us, born with a highly tuned bullshit detector!) who lives in the US. Living here I’m exposed to LOTS of motivational/self-help resources, much of which I dismiss as bullshit by the way. Americans love self help. They pay big bucks for it. Does this make them more open and trusting than Aussies? Or are they born lacking the requisite bullshit detector? Dunno. It’s interesting though. Not better or worse. Just different.
Oh, and, my friends here can’t believe that the goldmine of self-help available on this site is free. Free!
New (ish) kid on the block and not Aussie …
You know why I keep coming back here? Coz you’re REAL. You say it how it is whether I wanna hear it or not. Yep, you’re funny too. You have a way with words and somehow those words are getting under my skin. I may put up a fight some days but they get through anyway. Maybe not that day but they get through.
Some (not all) of the self-help gurus are in it for the money and status. I think you’re in it coz you’re genuine and really want to see people make the best of their lives. At the end of the day it’s down to choice. We jump on board or walk out the door.
I’m not going anywhere. I’m here for as long as it takes to get to where I’d like to be.
Since I stumbled across this site I’ve hit rock bottom with my health. Yeah, that “crunch moment” you spoke about a few days ago. I ignored the signs and no amount of beating myself up or being beaten up by others can change it, so I’m picking myself up, dusting myself off and moving forwards. No turning back.
I’ve learnt a lot too. No amount of skeletons in the family cupboard are strong enough to hold me any more. If the paternal side of my family want to live in the past then that’s up to them. I’m not them and I don’t want to be sucked in to that mentality any more. YES, part of me is still angry about some of those skeletons. I was a kid and spoke out when the older generation were too scared to (sometimes feels like I was their mouthpiece and all the responsibility was on my shoulders but that’s my demon and I’ll sort it).
I’m SLOWLY moving forwards on the weight loss journey. Slower than slow – I’m at a standstill. I’ve been up and down over the same 3lbs for the past 4 weeks. Yes I know. It’s what I’m putting in my mouth. Ok, so I’m learning about maintenance. I know I can do THAT part of it
. There are still 16 lbs less of me than there was on 13th April when I was taken to hospital. Patience, kid. I’m not getting off this rollercoaster.
Since I got out of hospital (Dr still won’t let me go back to work), I’ve completed my reflexology training (will know in a few weeks if I can officially call myself a therapist). I start the next phase of my journey tomorrow – about 9 months of anatomy and physiology study.
I’ve got off my butt and hit the gym. For the first month after going into hospital I could barely walk up the stairs. Now I’m doing 30-45 mins cardio each time I go and walking up at least 6 flights of stairs every day.
I’ve decided on a company name (no comment
), almost designed my logo and can’t wait to start building up my self-employment status. Will be working full time (while the business builds momentum) and studying as well as trying to stay focused on ME and what my body needs. It’s gonna be a challenging road but since when has getting to where you want to be been easy?
Outta here. Feel like I’m talking too much, lol.
I am very similar (in some ways) to the gentleman that you (Craig) met….I too don’t like many personal development people because of the cheese! BUT, thankfully, someone suggested that I read your blogs and instantly thought that you were speaking my language!! Not only do I find your “style” honest and direct but also quite witty. And I think we all need those three aspects of our lives.
When my hubby and I were about to get married 5ish years ago, our Rev suggested that we read a book (not sure whether I should mention it here?). I read it from cover to cover…probably beause I feared that I would be given questions at the end of it. My hubby read about 2 pages. Yep, he didn’t get it and couldn’t get past the cheese! Maybe I should suggest that he reads your work?
Hi,
The other day I went shopping to get some essentials’. Anyway bieng the basic person I am it didnt really take long within 5 minutes of being in red shop I had what I wanted… so I made my way to the cashier and payed.. then I stood there.. looking blankly at the lady behind the counter…
She said yes.. I looked down at my (as we are all so honest and yes I need them to) underpants and said ummm BAG… and she oh no we dont give them out anymore! Now I am just as environmental as anyone and NO i didnt go ther for a bag but YES considering the purchased definantely expected one… No Im wasnt asking for an armani bag, and to be honest i dont care if it was gonig to be plastic or a brown paper bag but for god sake package it… they are underpants you know.. and NO i dont think it in good taste for me to go shopping with these in my hands..
So said excuse me… and she no we dont give bags.. and I said well honey what is it going to take to get one.. and she said 10 cents.. so I reached in to my pocket (wasting yet another 5 minutes of my ilfe) as I was given what I came for.. High expectations I think NOT.. cleanliness? yes, common sense? to me it is ..
Need i say I am not going back to red shop but now shop at the blue shop… moral to the story if you work in a shop and are selling say over 3 items or ‘personal’ items please package them… it is good for the environment…
Cheers Kate
I was not a big fan of Tony Robbins until I saw an interview with him where he admitted even he cannot live everyday like he says. I have been watching on and off his youtube and taking away the Americanism and hype, it does go back to attitude again.
I think the biggest mistake these people make but is to blame the individual for their lives. I am not saying we don’t create our own life or reality, but I have been at these things where people have had terrible things happen and the guru has said ‘get over it’ and that includes one person who had a family member murdered. She went on that it was the person who was murdered who attracted it and to forgive the murderer and ask for a pardon. That is total **** that is when it goes too far.
I work at the Brisbane office of a major Australian law firm, and you came to speak to us a few months ago. I registered with your site after that session, and have been reading your emails ever since. This is my first comment – yay for de-lurking.
We were the group that were trundled into the room to hear some guy talk about something-or-other. But you were immediately engaging (I think that’s mostly as a result of your energy, and the fact that the room was mostly women and you’re a handsome guy. You can take that as a compliment – I bat for the other team!).
Anyway, I think that as a group we definitely had a massive bullshit detector. Most of the ‘self development’ opportunities are aimed at the legal staff, so I think as a whole the support staff (clerical, administrative, finance, library, catering, business services etc) are always a bit cynical about the stuff which is organised for us and which we are encouraged to attend. We were probably a little more on the crossed arms/legs side than other groups you might have spoken to. But that didn’t last long – and I think that some of us gave you as good as we got!
What I liked about your presentation that day was definitely the fact that you were self-deprecating. You were very real, you obviously thrived on telling it like it is (which totally works for me), and you didn’t mind completely taking the piss (out of yourself or others in the room). We all live in the real world – 9-5 jobs, families, kids, hobbies, etc. And apparently, so do you. You talk about topics that are relevant and common to everyone in the room (basically because we’re all breathing which means we wouldn’t mind being happy in this life). You use examples everyone can relate to or empathise with in some way or another (who can’t empathise with the torment of the fat kid in his swimmers on the pool starting block, even if you’ve never been fat?). You suggest a plan of action which costs nothing but a bit of brain power, effort and commitment on our part. There’s no dollars to spend, no gimmicks or gadgets or ‘buy this and your life will be truly marvellous’.
The only complaint I have about the session is that it wasn’t long enough (an hour, I think) and it left me wanting to hear more. And that wasn’t your fault.
)
Hi ,
Cracking up over the concept of Americans lacking BS detectors. We are a very receptive bunch (generally speaking) but you only get (a maximum of) your 15 minutes if there’s no substance. Of course there have been a few exceptions, but I won’t break the rule by name dropping.
My opinion on people who don’t like Tony Robbins “types” and have never even read their books are revealing a lot about their insecurities. They’re just in fear of being confronted with their lack of commitment towards bettering their life. They resent someone who has the passion and follow-through to achieve their dreams.
There have been posts here that have been hard to take but facing reality pays off. Thanks Craig
In relation to the Tony Robbins comment I believe that is the Australian “Tall Poppy Syndrome”. It is not that we dislike Tony Robbins because if we haven’t been to his seminars or read his material, then all we have seen is some of the “infomercials” which paints him as this bigger than life American with a huge following, is very wealthy and appears to be trying to “take over the world” with his knowledge and products. This is what most Aussies dislike – the bigger they are, often the more they are disliked (by those who know nothing of them). My jury was out about him personally although I guess I did slot a little into the category of thinking that he was just a “brash” individual, until my partner returned from a 3-day seminar and enlightened me about his philosophies. Aussies are very opinionated and often don’t arm themselves with knowledge but are happy to be critical. Personally this is where I believe Craig is converting the masses by educating many of us who possibly believed they could not be swayed – but Craig it is definitely your style that is influencing many. Keep up the good work and can’t wait for your book to come out – and you shouldn’t be afraid of promoting it heavily. At the end of the day you are there to improve people’s relationships and lives but are also there to earn a living.
Hi Adeyanju – no, I never forget my international readers – you (international readers) actually make up more than sixty percent of my readership..
Hi Danielle – thanks for de-lurking! Next time I’ll talk for longer- just for you.
Kate… I’m confused! (re the second comment)
Give it a go Kayley..
Hugs to everyone else
xx
I have been reading self help, motivational, spiritual type books for 15+ years now. I have been to the extreme places of being unrealistically optimistic to completely negative all through the interesting journey I have had thus far. (Never understood why those bazillion dollars didn’t arrive on my doorstep after 1 night of positive thinking
)
I am an optimist, a much more realistic one these days and am more interested in what I call “real people”. I love the people that pass on what tools etc they use to get through this life, which I believe you do. (Which is probably why I like reading autobiographies?) At no point you claim to be happy 100% all of the time or even have all the answers which to me is a real person with feelings and challenges etc…
I read your site, and we have actually met, and although I don’t agree with everything you write, and some days I see the words on the page and they are just words to me. What I do like is you challenge the normal way of living/thinking (Which resonates with me because that’s what I’m like anyway), which encourages conversation and exploration.
If I was to offer any advice it would be to “keep it real and with feeling”, people are looking for, even craving that.
Ian
Hi Craig,
you first inspired me when you spoke on Dave and Kim. Your style of teaching was straight and forward. Since then I feel I have connected with your blogs because you teach and don’t judge. You have brought me awareness through the way you speak not only as a coach but as human being.
I really enjoy that you don’t have set rules like some life coaches/counsellors and take into consideration we are all different,react different and all our situations are different.
I feel you don’t speak down to us but at us. You listen to us and don’t believe your way is the only way and always the right way for all.
I have read and listened to many life coaches and when they preach their way is the only way I don’t bother with them anymore.
LOL Mr Smarty pants.. I would spell it out ..but I seem to make to many typos…which appears to be identifying…
Minties get stuck in my teeth!
(referring to the last paragraph of the article)
Clichés are communication-killers. The hardest part of your work, Craig, (I think) is finding new ways to say the same thing again and again…without boring your audience to death.
For me you work because you are daggy Craig (in a good way). You are who you are. You don’t pretend to have it all together and give us some spiel. I love your no bullshit way of talking. Your articles are informative and funny, they engage you from start to finish and definately give us food for thought.
Thanks for a fantastic site.
Jacqui
Hi Craig,
just come across your article and blog…..very good reading. I agree with you Patricia, many (not all) ‘spiritual people’ seem to have big egos ie they have missed the consciousness/awareness thing completely.
Anyway keep up the good work and hope to bump into you post 2012…lol
Er, two different Kate posts from two different Kate’s
(I’m the expat post).
As one who’s conducted a variety of presentations, I found that when I finally let go of trying to be the highly professional, button-down sales type and “know it all”, and instead just focused on being myself and presenting in a style that is my own, I received much better evaluations. So this means that I strive to understand where my audience is coming from, put myself in their shoes, have some fun, and at times let my natural tendency to be a smartass add some additional flavor to my presentations. The best advice I ever received was “if you don’t know the answer, say you don’t, but that you will find out and follow-up. Then, make sure you follow-up!”
I want to people to keep coming back to my seminars, and they only way they will do it is if they feel like I’m honest and trying to help them out. I’ve been to some other seminars where the speaker was really polished, but I would not go back because, while the seminar was great (while I was there), I felt like I took away nothing. Maybe there’s a food and eating tie in here? I ate that 2nd (or third) donut that tasted great at the time, but end regretting it later.
Hold the cheese! I agree w/tbe fellow in the cafe. I can get all the cheese I need at at Macker’s. Your selling point – saving grace is your authenticity. Straight out. You talk to me as if there’s nobody else listening, just us.
I subscribe to several ‘self help’ sites and I open them all, but the moment I smell ‘cheese’ I find the delete switch. By contrast, when Craig Harper stops by, if I don’t have time to read it, it goes into the MOTIVATIONAL AUSSIE file.
People who don’t pretend. That’s what I want more of. People who can sit in their own truth comfortably, even if it makes others feel uncomfortable. I like to consider other points of view, perhaps agree. Perhaps not. Just make it authentic and real so there is no need to filter ‘cheese’ please!
As a blog and website owner as well as a speaker myself, I totally understand the heart of this post, when you stand up to address an audience a lot of them are thinking to themselves “what makes this guy think he is better than me or that he can fix my problems or even tell me what to do” and it can be difficult to break that resistance as you said.
One of the things I try to do that my readers and people that have attended my talks have given me feedback on is that I try to be honest and real with people and not be cheesy, people like honesty and they like to know that you too are facing or have at some point faced the same things they are going through, they want to be able to connect with you and know that you understand where they are coming from and the way to do that is by showing that you are a real and normal person who faces challenges as well, and that the only difference between you and them is that you have strategies that you apply to overcome those challenges and all you are trying to do is share those strategies with them so that they can get results also.
well thats my approach anywayz
Craig
I am so loving your articles!! i have been on a tweet fest tonight tweeting them everywhere… getting some comments to on my facebook account.
I love your writing style.. its just so refreshing and down to earth.
Ps. I love Tony Robbins. I used to think his voice was annoying too. but when I actually listened to his message… I was hooked. His new show ‘breakthrough to success’ is just amazing.
Jenni
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