A Shove with Love – A Kickstart to Change.

Morning (afternoon, evening) Groovers.

Stepping into reality

Thought we might be a little less theoretical and philosophical, and a bit more practical today. Always nice to get out of our head and into reality. We all have behaviours and habits that we need to change and from time to time we all need a little encouragement and support, possibly a vigorous shove, to get under way. So I’m here today to give you a shove. You can relax and feel safe in the knowledge that I am a fully qualified and vastly experienced shover. I have shoved many over my journey, including a few statues who have made the job pretty tough. I know that some of you are career procrastinators who have been about to address certain less-than-desirable habits forever; always at the brink of something life-changing but never quite there. And that some of you have even started (four hundred times) but never actually maintained.

The caring sledgehammer

hard hatKnowing that many of you are perpetually waiting for the magical and mythical ‘right time’ (it doesn’t exist) and knowing that many of you struggle to create and maintain momentum, I thought that today I might give some of you a shove with love. You may even like it. I’ll be gentle. Gentle like a sledgehammer. A caring sledgehammer.

Yep, I want you to identify one habit which you really need to change right now. Not soon, now. Not when it suits you, now. Not when you’re comfortable to do so, now. It can be any behaviour which is impacting negatively in some area of your life. It might be about food or exercise, it could be alcohol or drug related, it could have something to do with how you treat yourself or others, it might pertain to work, home or somewhere else. It may have something to do with how you deal with or react to certain situations, circumstances, events or people. It might be about your lifestyle, your finances, your long-term goals or perhaps some other kind of destructive habit (lying, stealing, violence, self-abuse, obsessive behaviours). You know what you need to change.

We all want to move from the negative to the positive in our life, that’s why we come to this site. But there needs to come a time when we stop planning, talking and thinking and start doing. Thinking doesn’t create change, doing does. Some of you think too much and do too little. You know it.

One habit at a time

The reason I want you to identify one habit (only) for this 28-day project is because the more things we try to change in a short time, the less likely we are to maintain those behaviours (what we want) and create life-long results. By identifying our single most destructive habit and addressing that in a strategic, practical and un-emotional manner, we greatly increase our chances of success. People who try to undo years of bad behaviours and change fifty habits in a short amount of time invariably fail. So let’s do what works.

cigaretteOf course 28 days isn’t a lifetime but it’s enough time for me (and the other readers) to help you generate some momentum, build some enthusiasm and hopefully start to create some new habits, behaviours and attitudes to get you where you want to go over the long term. Of course I can only get you started, and of course, ultimately it all comes back to you. But for some of you, this little project might just be a life-changing process – if YOU make it so.

How to get involved.

Click on the comment thingy and tell me (us) the following.

1. The habit you’re going to address over the 28 days.
2. Why it’s necessary for you to change that habit.
3. Why it will be different this time.

Keep it short(ish), we don’t need an essay – just the facts Jack. If you are uncomfortable to leave your name then do it anonymously but keep in mind that public declarations can often be an effective way to create and maintain momentum. Name or not – it’s not crucial.

Even though I’m not particularly good at waiting, I’m going to make the official ’start date’ of this little extravaganza next Monday (May 26). I’m doing this to allow a few days for people who don’t visit the site daily (shame on you) to get involved without missing the official start. Of course you can start in the next five minutes if you like, and for many of you that would be advisable. Either way, the official kick-off is next Monday and we’ll wrap it up on Sunday June 22 (RYL Workshop day).

Friday updates.
teamwork
To keep you accountable and doing what you need to do, you will be required to submit a brief ‘update’ every Friday by clicking on the comment thingy at the bottom of that day’s post. That will help you stay focused, committed and proactive. Feel free to jump in and comment on each other’s goals and progress at any time. Encouragement and support is fundamental to success. If this concept flies, is well-supported and seems to be of value, then we’ll continue the process beyond the 28 days by using our forum.

Okay, stop over-thinking, get off the fence, click on the comment thingy and tell us what amazing things you’re gonna do over the next 28 days.

Ciao Kids.

{ 111 comments… read them below or add one }

Emma May 27, 2008 at 11:07 am

Okay – so Sunday at 2:00pm was my last cigarette. It’s 10:36am on Tuesday and not a single wisp of smoke has entered my lungs. I’m okay…not even tempted, what the?

Let’s see how that goes, when I either have an alcoholic beverage (biig trigger) or a really stressful day (huuuge trigger) then I’ll talk about whether it’s easy or not!

Emma

Leeza May 27, 2008 at 1:36 pm

Emma,
That is a great job!! I quit smoking 17 years ago and I can tell you that those triggers come and they are hard to get through, but you can get through them and you will feel great for doing so. When that urge to smoke comes, remind yourself of the bigger prize – your health!
Leeza

Anonymous May 29, 2008 at 2:21 am

Hi Craig and everyone,
I’m late to sign up, but want this kick in the pants to deal with the last outstanding issue in a 20-year (ok I’m slow!)process of quitting smoking, gradually losing and maintaing a 60-pound weight loss, eating healthfully and getting fit. My outstanding issue is binge eating – not often anymore but it really sticks out in the sea of otherwise healthy eating. I know my triggers and have been experimenting with techniques to stop. So for the next 28 days from today (May 28), I will not binge eat.
Thanks everyone
L.

Tami May 29, 2008 at 3:05 am

Ok…
If it’s not too late, I want in!
I have a terrible habit that I thought I broke…
As it turns out, I only bent it.
I doubt and underestimate myself constantly.
This deep rooted problem tends to
sabotage my efforts and achievements!
But I am clever and no one knows
… so I seem calm, cool, and levelheaded but beneath the surface…
not so much.

So beginning today (5/28/08), I will conscientiously, dash away those judgmental, negative voices and replace them with thoughts of encouragement!

Tami B

Michelle May 30, 2008 at 4:28 pm

Hi I am a bit late as I have only just figured out how to get into it..lol

I need to get more active, I have lost 18.8kg in 18 weeks and Now I really need to get on with toning myself up which will help with the rest of my weight loss journey.

I have a couple of exercise dvd, so i will use them everyday and also do more walking

Thanks Craig for this awesome task

Michelle

featherfour June 4, 2008 at 10:21 am

Is it to late for me to join in?

I want to get on my treadmill. I want to get on there every day and do at least 20 minutes.

1 it is good for my cardio health
2 it is good for my brain health (serotonin)
3 my doctor said I have to
4 I want to lose weight

amanda

Anonymous June 5, 2008 at 9:12 am

I came across this on 30 May .. but decided to start anyway. So, one week in I have been successful on two fronts. 1) I overdue the butter and toast – so I have given up butter for the 28 days. 2) I drink too much coffee – yes, I know we all have different ideas of what too much is … my wife says any coffee is too much! – so my commitment is 2 coffees a day, one I make one I buy (helps the wallet too! Craig, thanks for all the great stuff on your site. John.

danob June 21, 2008 at 5:44 am

so: This my first Friday post since the original “Shove.” I’m embarrassed, because I wasn’t really able to maintain my commitment to drink less — it has too much power.

Nonetheless, having made a public commitment (even to strangers) makes a difference. It reveals the gap between my ideals/promises/goals and my reality, where I can find a hundred rationalizations for not living up to those ideals.

So I’m going to try again during the coming 28 days — although I obviously haven’t gotten to Yoda’s point – there is no TRY, only DO!

I also console myself that it typically takes a smoker several attempts before it “takes.”

Good luck to all.

Dan

Anonymous June 21, 2008 at 6:16 pm

Oh Damn!

I have only just found the 28 day challenge! And the cut off time is tomorrow the 22nd! Looks like I’ll have to keep up the drinking…

gudiya July 25, 2008 at 7:44 pm

Hello Craig,

1 thing I will do exercise everyday because health is wealth than only I can achieve my goals.

thanks

gudiya August 1, 2008 at 9:45 pm

hi craig,
I m not able to do the excerise everyday.As I m not able to take time for it.

What should I do to be focus?

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