Adaptation = Happiness… or does it?

You’d hafta be silly or brave to write a post on happiness.
So silly me is gonna give it a crack.
I had no plans for this piece (like I plan my writing!)… it came out of a conversation I had yesterday.
It asked to be written.

It’s fair to assume that we’re all different and therefore all have different goals.
Common sense really.
I think that most free-thinking, objective, amateur behavioural psychologists (like you and me) would agree on this.

As usual, I have another perspective to throw into the mix.
Of course I do.
I would like to put forward the theory that at our core, we all actually have the same goal; happiness.

Therefore, on a level.. we’re all the exactly same.
The end.

Okay, I’ll keep going.
But I coulda finished it there.

Yes, we know it’s represented by different things for different people, and we all need to find our mechanism or path to it… but ultimately, we all want to be in that state of happiness.

I’ll prove it.
Okay everyone…. put up yer hand if misery is your goal.
See, nobody.
Told ya.

Happiness it is.

A few thoughts on achieving happiness from the ex-bodybuilder:

It’s dawned on me lately that our ability to be happy, fulfilled and content is (often) largely dependant on our ability to change, grow with, adapt to, evolve around and understand our ever-changing, dynamic world and everything and everyone in it (family, career, academia, relationships, attitudes, culture, ideologies, technology, other people).

Our environment and everything in it, is in a constant state of flux.
But we are often emotionally-immovable, psychologically-paralysed, don’t-try-and-change-me, stubborn, walls of fear, doubt, aggression and insecurity.

“I’m not changing; the world can change around me.”
“You can all adapt to my needs, personality, issues, idiosyncrasies.”
“It’s my way or the highway Baby.”

We all know that nobody would openly say this stuff (okay, a few would)… but it’s actually how many of us think and live.

I don’t believe this (necessarily) means that we need to change or compromise our core beliefs and/or values (but then maybe we do), but far too many of us stop (consciously) learning, growing, developing and adapting (emotionally, psychologically, academically, physically, creatively, practically, technologically) when we hit our late teens or early twenties.

We become like the lump of clay that has set; no longer able to be moulded or shaped.
“Don’t bend, twist or stress me; I’ll break.”
“This is me… I’m done.”
“I’ve learned all I’m gonna learn, get off my case.”

Everything around us is in a constant state of change, while we are (often) in a constant state of same.
This is a big problem.
On many levels.

So we end up with what we see (so frequently) today; a largely unhappy, frustrated, confused, directionless, unfulfilled bunch of people determined to make everything and everyone work around their unwillingness to adapt and their non-negotiable stance on pretty much everything.

Therefore we can hypothesize that (to an extent) an individual’s overall level of happiness (joy, peace, fulfillment) will be dependant on their ability to adapt.

We may know what we want (have clarity).
We may have clearly defined values, beliefs, morals and principles.
But if we don’t have an ability to learn, evolve, grow, change (adapt) at any age (are you listening!)… it is my contention (your Honor) that we’re gonna miss the Happiness boat.

And who wants to be stuck on the island with the miserable, grumpy people?

* Let me know what you think and where you’re from. *