Your Future: Destiny or Decision?

Here’s a version of a conversation I’ve had many times…..

“Craig, I don’t know what I’m meant to do with my life.”
“What do you mean… ‘meant’ to do?”
“Well, I want to discover what my purpose is.”
“What makes you think you need to ‘discover’ it? Can’t you just choose it? Create it?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, you sound like you believe that your life purpose has somehow been pre-determined and you need to figure out what that determination was.”
“Isn’t that how it works?”
“I’m gonna go with, no! Unless there’s a memo I missed, I’m pretty sure you’re not a mindless puppet in some kind of cosmic play.”
“Then what?”
“Here’s a concept: you totally decide what your purpose is. All by yourself. Not your parents, not your boss, not your friends and not your guru. You.”
“Hmm… but I was raised to believe something different.”
“And how’s that working for you?”
“Not so good.”
“Until someone can prove that your life story has already been written, your future predetermined and that you have no say in how it all plays out, then I’m gonna suggest that you to write your own story. Choose your own purpose. Consciously, responsibly and passionately determine your own destiny with your day-to-day thoughts, choices and actions. I also suggest that you get clear about your core values and then strive to live in alignment with them. You don’t need someone or something to tell you what to do with your life or how to do it.” 
“Okay.”
“Allowing someone else to determine your future is the ultimate betrayal of your potential and possibilities. It’s also completely unnecessary.”

Think about it, if your life was (somehow) predetermined, then what would the point of being able to think, choose, act and create for yourself be? And if we were just characters playing a role in somebody’s predetermined story, then the concept of ‘creating our best life’ would be redundant and we’d all be wasting our time.

Fortunately, it isn’t and we’re not. ;)

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{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }

Anonymous June 8, 2014 at 8:08 pm

Great article Craig and its empowering to know that my future is in my control. It’s a topic I’ve pondered in recent days. It sounds so plain and simple and it probably is….when you know how.
It’s no different to health and fitness…once I knew how, it was plain and simple with the only thing blocking my success being myself. But somebody had to show me the steps between point A and point B first, before I could make my way to the desired destination point.

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Anonymous June 9, 2014 at 2:38 am

I don’t think I’ve told you how glad I am to find you back in my inbox… thank you!

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Anonymous June 9, 2014 at 2:47 am

Not a mindless puppet in some kind of cosmic play … but not totally unconstrained either. You’ve got to work from where you are (sometimes I look around and think how did I get here?) – though I agree how you got to your current situation isn’t as important as what you do next.

After eight years off work sick I’ve started to make moves towards getting back into work – very nervous about this, but quite excited as well. To try and get a foothold back into the work world I’ve applied to do some voluntary work.

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Patricia Singleton June 9, 2014 at 4:45 am

Some people look at my choice of purpose and see me wallowing in the pain of incest because I talk about incest and my issues openly on Facebook, Twitter and on my blog. I am not living in the pain. I am a survivor, becoming thriver, who uses my healing experiences to help other incest survivors to start their own healing journey. I also use my message to educate others to the sexual abuse that is still happening in this world to more children . My abuse and that of many others happened in the silence. I won’t be silenced today. I am an advocate for children and all survivors. That is my purpose. I chose it.

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Jackie June 9, 2014 at 7:43 am

Thanks for your common sense, Craig. I get so fed up hearing people saying things like, ‘it was meant to be, ‘it was in the stars’ etc etc, as if we’re just puppets with someone else pulling the strings. If that’s the case why did I waste my life teaching kids? Should have just let them go where destiny took them.

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Evan June 9, 2014 at 8:55 am

Hmm. I think we can choose in accord with who we are.

To choose ourselves rather than others doesn’t mean we’re nothing. We can choose in accord with our inclinations, preferences and so on.

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Erika June 9, 2014 at 9:29 am

Wow…
Talk about re enforcement of what I completed this weekend.
We all have the possibility of anything.

We don’t have to choose in accordance to who we are, we just have to choose, because we choose.
We have to learn to be authentic in everything we do and not let our ‘story’s’ control us, wehe power to create our own story
Thank you Craig for being you and choosing to be real and authentic.
Forever grateful

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Anonymous June 9, 2014 at 8:43 pm

Bugger…I should have listened to myself…

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VeganChic June 9, 2014 at 9:51 pm

Thank you so very much for confirmation Craig!! you’re a gem!! And I too am glad you are back in my in box!!

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ecmcspline June 10, 2014 at 11:30 am

I predetermined that dishwashing tablets were the best for our dishwasher, however, on trying the powder (something new) I found the dishes came out alot cleaner and we had people comment. A shift in mindset and away we go :-)

Thanks Craig and sorry for my try hard analogy LOL

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Ronald June 11, 2014 at 12:43 am

Damn. I better get cracking then!

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Anonymous June 13, 2014 at 8:05 pm

It would be interesting to know your thoughts on the ideas of someone like Wayne Dyer? His books seem to be making a lot of sense to me. But my head hasn’t quite got round the concept of free will and divine intention (sorry if this sounds wafty, I don’t know how else to put it). Please would you consider writing something on this some day? On this subject, it would also be interesting to know more about your thoughts about God (even whether you think there is one or not). I remember some time back you wrote a post about being a Jedi, which treated the subject quite light-heartedly, but it would be good to know more about your ideas. Thank you, as ever, for taking the time to write your posts.

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