Archive of Motivational Speaker

Welcome to Craig's site.

Craig Harper is a leading motivational speaker and educator. He is a highly sought-after corporate coach and is considered to be a leader and pioneer in the areas of personal and professional development. Working with hundreds of teams, companies and a wide variety of organisations on numerous continents over the last twenty years has given Craig a unique insight into, and understanding of, human performance and all its variables. Craig has an ability to educate, inspire, challenge and make people laugh all at the same time!

Renovate Your Life Blog

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Bloggersauras?... it is SO a word.

Sometimes what I write is insightful and clever.
Sometimes not.
Now and then it's thought-provoking and confronting.
Occasionally it's deep and philosophical.
Confusing perhaps.
Periodically it's controversial, if not, politically incorrect.
It's even been labeled... blunt.
I can't believe that.
So not fair.

Well anyway, today... it's nunnathat.
Today, we're going with amusing, silly and creative.
My site, my rules.
No editors, no pressure, no deadlines.
Freestyle Craig.
Giddyup.

For me, the best part of blogging is the creative freedom.
There really is no right or wrong.
(Sure... there's better and worse).
When I sit down to a blank computer screen with a mind full of ideas, it's like I'm five years old, I've got the biggest piece of paper in the world and an endless supply of crayons and paints.

Sometimes the heavy-duty, life-changing, let's-analyse-ourselves (again), grown-up stuff gets a little emotionally cumbersome and exhausting (even for me).
Kinda like walking continuously in knee-deep mud; laborious, smelly, tiring and draining.

Occasionally we need to get out of the mud, close our eyes and spin ourselves around in circles, head up to the clouds until we fall down on the freshly cut grass.
And then get up and do it again.
And then do a forward roll and stand triumphantly with our arms in the air while we wait for the judges score.

Unless or course we're too sophisticated and mature (self-conscious and dysfunctional) to have so much fun.
Remember fun?
Those were the days.

So now and then it's appropriate, if not necessary, for me to take off my Craig-the-Coach hat and put on my Craig-don't-let-the-teacher-see-what-we're-doing... hat.
Now and then, silly is good.
Let's not analyse, investigate or theorise on anything... for a day.

To the uninitiated, the blogoshpere can be a daunting place.
It was for me.

It's very big (and growing like a weed), has it's own (rapidly evolving) culture and language, occasionally has credibility issues (due to the huge amount of cyber-crap some people call blog sites) and regularly seems to have identity issues.... in that, a large percentage of the general population don't have a clue about what they are, or why they exist.

Someone recently told me they thought a blog was like an online diary that teenage girls keep to update each other on their social lives.
Hmm.
Few (million) of those around too.

Just over nine months ago the bald man sat me down and did his best to explain the concept of blogging and the potential fun and creative freedom that might be had by me, in developing a site such as this.

I didn't really know what a blog was... had a vague notion, but didn't totally get it.
Alright, I was clueless.

The first two months cruising the blogoshpere was like being a tourist in a non English-speaking country with no phrase book, no maps and no interpreter... especially exploring some of the blog-development(?) sites with all the bloggerspeak.

So many words and terms.

"Johnnie what's a Post... and why is it not called an article... looks like, smells like and reads.. like an article?"
"Err well Craig.. it just is."

(He always had those enlightening responses for me).

And as you all know:

1) Language is a constantly evolving thing.

2) I have a propensity to invent (often stupid) words (Craig, the word-ologist)

3) All words are born somewhere (perhaps some will be born on this site).
Somewhere, some time... someone breathed life into the very words you and I speak every day.

For example... The term blogosphere was coined on September 10, 1999 by Brad L. Graham, as a joke... now it's part of a world-wide culture and language and used millions of times by millions of people every day.

So, rather than wait for these new words to appear on our screens... I thought that perhaps you and I (being the creative forces that we are).. could become linguistic pioneers, going boldly where few have gone and invent a few words (or terms) of our own.

Maybe we can become part of history.

Imagine creating something which becomes part of every day language...

Here are a few to get you started... (I came up with these and then subsequently discovered that some of them... are already floating in the blogoshpere... Doh!.. not quick enough or creative enough!).

And yes, it's meant to be tongue-in-cheek.

Bloggette - a small blog.

Bloggersaurus - an early blogger (from the 90's).

Bloggernaut - someone who boldly explores the outer-reaches of the blogosphere.

Blogvertorial - an advertisement (or series of advertisements) thinly disguised as a blog site. May also be a single post on an otherwise legitimate site... usually promoting one or all of the five P's (pill, powder, potion, product or program).

Blogology - science of (or study of) blogging.

Blogologist - one who studies blogs.

Bloggerlicious - an attractive blogger (good luck finding one).

Bloggish - looks like a blog.. but isn't.

Blogoholic - someone addicted to reading and/or writing blogs (I actually know a few people who are heading towards this!)... "Hello, I'm Kelvin and I'm a blogoholic..."

Bloginator - bad-ass blogger.

Bloggee - reader of blogs

So there it is; a smattering of (newish) words to get you started.
Now it's your turn to create and define your own word (or two) to add to our blogger's dictionary. The dictionary will feature on our home page (in the sidebar) for the next few months and will evolve with your help.
We will credit you for your word/s.
It is an exercise in fun and creativity but you never know... maybe you'll create a word which will be embraced by the next generation of bloggers.

So we need:
(1) The word (how you want it spelled).

(2) Your desired Pronunciation (unless it's obvious).

(3) Definition.

(4) Your name (or cybername if you prefer).

Okay, put your thinking caps on and have some fun.
(Don't be a scaredy-cat).

If you're struggling to come up with your own addition to our dictionary, let us know your thoughts on the evolution of the language of blogging.

See ya.

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Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Stop Interrupting me with Your Logic; I'm Having a Breakdown.

You don't need a PhD to understand that we human beings are complex physical, emotional, spiritual and cerebral creatures; we all get this.
(I hope).
And while we know that we're highly-evolved (some more than others), multi-dimensional beings, the truth is that some of us have a propensity to be (periodically) a little one-dimensional.

Namely, emotional.
(Not you of course, but perhaps someone you know).

And while we take occasional trips to the cerebral, physical and spiritual planes... it seems that some of us constantly inhabit the emotional.

And while it's a nice place to visit... living there (permanently) ain't a great life strategy.
I know people who have never left.

Their life is a never-ending series of emotional events.
Every day is a new drama.
Look up the word turmoil... you'll see a picture of them.

These people are hard work.
For themselves and for others.
They have an amazing capacity to vacillate between grumpy, happy, sad, frustrated, resentful and back to happy... all within six minutes.
Ninety times a day.

And then tell you why it's your fault.

Logic, common sense and reality don't typically factor into their decision making process.
In fact... they don't really have a decision making process... more, an (over)reacting process.
Sure, we're all emotional at times (that's normal and healthy)... that's not what we're exploring here... I'm talking about people who constantly let their emotions manage them... rather than the other way around.

They create stress.
Problems.
Make the easy, hard.
Turn simple, mundane challenges into monumental, attention-grabbing, nobody-understands-me... episodes.
They let their emotions ruin friendships, marriages, their career, their health and sadly.. their life.
Being the (wanna-be) alpha-male warrior that I am, I need to be careful when I explore the emotional stuff... wouldn't wanna be labeled as an emotionally-disconnected, insensitive, hard-core boofhead.

Azif.

After all, what would an ex-bodybuilder with a shaved head and an obsession with cheesecake know about the touchy-feely stuff?

Amazingly, plenty.

Some people think I spend my life talking about dumbbells, carbs, body-fat percentages and biceps.
I wish it was that simple.
No, even as an exercise scientist, much of my time and energy is focused on everything except the physical, practical stuff.
For many people getting in shape is largely an emotional process.
(For many people... life is entirely an emotional process.)

I actually spend a great deal of my time talking to people about how to manage their out-of-control emotions (fears, insecurities, self-esteem issues, eating issues, destructive habits).
Their body-fat, blood pressure and chunky thighs are actually the least of their problems (but they often don't know it).
Typically, their emotions determine what they do.
And don't do.

Their (very capable) mind is held hostage by their over-powering and non-negotiable emotions.
Insecurity has their arm twisted up their back.
They have an incredible ability to ignore reality, logic, common sense and the advice of others.
They are largely controlled by fear.
Fear of failure, rejection, humiliation, pain, poverty... and a whole bunch more.

The truth is.. if we don't throw a little logic, reason and rational thought into how we do life, invariably we end up miserable, distressed, anxious, unfulfilled... and in therapy paying off some bloke's (or chick's) beach house.
(I believe in therapy.... sometimes).
(I also believe it's over-prescribed).

Being periodically fearful, insecure, self-conscious and anxious is a normal part of the human condition... being held hostage to these emotions is destructive, tragic and unnecessary.

And common.

We all understand that what we feel (the emotional stuff) and what we think or know to be true ( the cerebral stuff)... don't always align.
In fact... often don't align.

Sometimes we need to take a certain course of action, do certain things, make certain decisions (because logic and common sense tell us so) even though the insecure, fearful, self-protecting eight year-old in us is kicking and screaming to the contrary.

WE will always be our biggest challenge.
I've been arguing with myself for years.

"Have not..."

See what I mean?

Many (many, many) times in my life, my logic (what I know I should do) and my emotions (what I'm feeling) have been light years apart.
The self-protecting, fourteen year-old, insecure fat kid was running desperately in one direction, while the high-achiever adult was desperately clawing his way forward in the opposite direction.
Doing what was totally uncomfortable... but necessary.

It's so easy to rationalise inactivity, laziness, procrastination, apathy, mediocrity when we want to... we can justify and explain anything if we try hard enough.
I watch people do it every day.

"But Craig... you don't understand my situation... I'm unique to mankind.... nobody's been through what I have..."

Talk to the hand Dreamer.
Get over yourself.

Sometimes (today perhaps) we need to make certain decisions and take specific action DESPITE our feelings.
Despite the pain.
Despite what happened when we were a teenager.
Despite the fear.
Despite our history.

And while those negative emotions are screaming for attention like a spoiled brat... our highly intelligent, astute, very mature and responsible(!) mind is calmly saying... "get over this little episode, compose yourself and do what you need to do to create the desired result".

You and I need to make that choice.

Despite what we feel.

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Saturday, June 23, 2007

A Tune and Service for craigharper.com

Every now and then I take my car to the garage for a service.
The guy puts it up on the hoist and checks everything; the brakes, the gear box, the engine, oil, filters... all the stuff that makes it go.
And stop.
(Me trying to sound mechanical is a.. s-t-r-e-t-c-h).
Anyway, he pokes, prods, tests, tightens, aligns, adjusts and tweaks the beast to make sure it's performing optimally; doing what it should.

Well, today is the first service for craigharper.com and you... are my mechanics.
I know you didn't apply for the position but you're here... so I choose you.
Hey, I've been putting out... now it's your turn!

We're gonna put this little baby (the site) up on the hoist, walk around, kick the tyres and see what needs to be adjusted, removed, added or modified.

Since the bald man and I breathed life into this cyber-organism we call craigharper.com nine months ago, we have both learned much.
As parents (clearly, I'm the mother) we have nurtured our baby through the teething stage, changed those horrendous nappies (diapers), dealt with some occasional cyber-flatulence and watched proudly as Junior took her first wobbly steps in the blogosphere.

And many of you having been cheering us on since day one (or thereabouts).
And a few of you... not.
Thanks.
(To both groups).

(Don't ask me why our website is a female... but apparently, she is. I guess it just felt heartless to call something that we've nurtured and poured our heart and soul into... an it.. and perhaps she's too evolved, sensitive and insightful to be a bloke... Yep, that's it).
Hang on... did I just shoot my self in the foot?

What-e-v-e-r.

Anyway, she has given us plenty of headaches and grief and cost us a bunch in terms of time, money, emotional, creative and physical energy.. and resources. But at the same time, she's given us much satisfaction, pleasure and joy.

Now and then (when he thinks nobody's watching) I catch Johnnie (my web-guru-dude) just staring pathetically at the home page, paternal juices flowing, heart full of love, hope and anticipation... the textbook cyber-dad.

Sometimes I step back and wonder what will become of Junior as she grows up.
Will she become an invaluable resource, used and appreciated by millions... or will she become another cyber-relic on the blogospheric scrap heap?
Or perhaps an energy-draining, cyber-pain-in-the-ass for it's creators?
(Alright... her parents).
Don't think so.

Like everything the bald man and I do, we wanted to create something amazing.
Something which will make a difference.
Something not-the-same.
Something which can potentially be of value to people all over the world.

So the day I discover that this site is simply another site, churning out predictable, repetitive, stereo-typical personal development diatribe... is the day I hang up the keyboard and take up golf.
Just let me know when I do this and I'll be out of your lives before you can say deoxyribonucleic acid.

For me, every day blogging has been a lesson in something (patience, technology, communication, adaptation, endurance, cyber-language)... and every week has brought with it new challenges, opportunities and perspective.
People have been generous with their feedback, support and encouragement for what we're doing here and for what we're trying to create... and specifically for the way I deliver my messages; my writing style.
Thanks again.

A few have been critical and not-so-nice... that's okay too.
I'm just a bloke who has a certain perspective on things... and that's what I share.
I will never write what I think people want to hear... I'll always write what I believe to be the truth.
Then it's up to you to decide if, on some level, what I write resonates within you.
If that particular message is relevant and meaningful for you.
If it has an application in your life, situation, reality.
Keeping in mind that one person's life-changing revelation will be another person's momentary distraction.

If your goal (in visiting my site) is to create genuine positive change (verses engaging in some light reading and entertainment), then I suggest that you wipe the crap off your shoes and take off your precious hat when you walk through the craigharper.com door.

I want you to enjoy the Craig Harper experience... but more than that, I want you to grow... and we all know that real change is often an uncomfortable, confronting, difficult process.
(But many writers/coaches/gurus don't want to 'share' this truth because it ain't sexy enough for them to market... after all, who wants to buy hard work... when there's a pill, program or product?).

I'm normal (alright, that's in dispute) in that, I want to be liked... but honestly, I'd rather be respected.

Genuine (forever) growth is typically about dealing with the stuff we've avoided for years... the emotional, physical, financial, behavioural, spiritual, relationship, practical stuff.

You know the stuff.

You also know that I'm not interested in the feel-good, easy-to-market, let's-sell-a-million-books personal development fluff... I am interested in what works.

I'm not interested in what's popular.. I'm interested in what's effective.

I will be wrong regularly.
I will be criticised.
And I will gladly keep learning.
But ultimately this site is not about right and wrong; it's about ideas, thoughts, suggestions and strategies.

It's about connecting, inspiring, pushing buttons and being thought-provoking.
It's about unlearning the crap we've be programmed with since we were kids.
It's about exploring how we can create our best life.... not our best day, best week or best month... no, our best life.
It's not about how to get rich; it's about how to decide what (true) wealth is (for us).
It's about hope.
It's about self-exploration.
It's about what might be.
And... it's about having fun (let's not get too grown-up and mature... adults are boring!)

The last nine months have taught me that producing high quality, original content on an almost-daily basis is a tough gig... the truth is that there ain't much that hasn't already been said (in some way).

So it's really all about how I say it.
My ability to connect with you.
To know how you're wired.
To know how to push those get-off-your-ass buttons.

In my opinion there are too many web-sites which are nothing more than electronic pin-up boards for displaying other (smarter) people's ideas, philosophies, creativity and talent.
If that's what blogging is about... I resign.

If you can't write, if you're incapable of an original idea or creative thought, if you don't have your own philosophy and ideas... then don't create a blog site!

If I want to hear from Tony Robbins, I'll buy the CD's, I'll do the seminar.
I don't need a Tony Robbins parrot rehashing and repeating verbatim what they heard on some DVD or program. The big fella is gifted, talented and amazing... but Tony Robbins clones (or any clones) drive me nuts.

Learn from your teacher... but be you.
Your own thoughts.
Your own experiences.
Your own identity.

Note to would-be (or current) bloggers:
1. Be original.
2. Develop your own philosophy based on your experiences, your journey, your revelations.
3. Don't be lazy; work harder and smarter than most.
4. Consistently copying and pasting other people's words onto your site is an embarrassment, demonstrates a distinct lack of talent, insight and creativity... and is not blogging.

So after that exceptionally long-winded introduction, what do I want from you?
A few things (please):

I want constructive, specific feedback about this site... commenting on anything is cool (cartoons, colours, layout, writing style, subject matter).
What do you like?
What don't you like?
What would you like me to write about?
What should I do differently?
Would you be interested in face to face workshops if I was in your state/country?
Any ideas or suggestions you may have.

While I love writing and I love the opportunity to connect with people from all over the globe, I also need to take stock (put the site up on the hoist) and assess what I do, why I do it, how I do it, when I do it... and if, when, why and how I might do it better in the future.

Or, if I would be better off to invest my time and energy elsewhere.
Maybe I could create Harperland... kind of like Dollywood but without the breasts and wigs.
And less rides.
I digress.

Don't misinterpret what I'm saying, I love this site and I have no plans to stop doing what I'm doing.. but I believe we should all regularly evaluate where and how we invest our time, energy and talent... and asses the return (financial, emotional, experiential, educational.. etc.) on that investment.

For me, this site is not about money.
It was never going to be.
That's why I don't charge for articles, don't have memberships and don't ask for donations.
And never will.
If my financial security was dependant on this site... I'd be eating bread for dinner and living in a cardboard box.
Yes, we sell a few books... but the truth is that anyone from anywhere in the world can visit this site and find some original, inspiration, education and motivation for free.. every day of the week.

I'm fortunate enough to have a business which takes care of me financially, so the site was never intended to be a 'business' venture, but rather a creative outlet and information portal for seekers and students.

I'm happy if you never spend a cent here.
I don't want your money.
No hook, no agenda, no catch.
As objective as I can be about my own site... I think that's a pretty good deal.

Anyway, enough of the feel-good lovey-dovey stuff.
Now, get off your ass and give me some feedback.
See ya.

Let us know your name and where you're from.

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Wednesday, June 20, 2007

The Ship Without a Rudder

Lately I have spent a great deal of time with rudder-less ships.
People who get up each morning and do exactly what they did yesterday.
Not that they particularly want to... it's just what they do.
They do the same.
Day in, day out.
Year in, year out.

They expend a huge amount of energy sailing in circles on the Sea of Frustration.
Talk to them and they have no real direction.
No clarity and no certainty about what they want their future to look like.
They are desperate for different... without really knowing exactly (or even vaguely) what that different is.

They've never really defined it.
They have no real direction, purpose or vision.
For them life is a chore; a series of unplanned (and often unenjoyable) events.
Life happens to them, around them and in spite of them.

They don't create their best life... their life creates them.

Their daily reality is shaped (if not, totally controlled) by situations, circumstances, events and other people.
They haven't made a (significant) decision in years.
Ever perhaps.
Too fearful, too disorganised, too apathetic, too full of excuses.

They don't set goals (tried it once... didn't work... only leads to disappointment... too much pain). Sure, they know what goal setting is (that is, they have an intellectual understanding of it) but they don't have a practical application of it in their life.

They hope, they wish, they wait... but they don't have clearly defined goals that have translated to actual works in progress.

Much of their existence is spent negotiating a series of unplanned events.
They spend their days reacting and surviving, rather than creating and thriving.
They hope that their crappy life will somehow fix itself or fall into place.

Or perhaps someone or something... will save them.

"How come nothing good ever happens to me?"... people ask me all the time.

The only thing which needs to happen for our life to change for the better... is us; we need to happen.

Many of us have never (seriously) sat down to plan (think, decide, rationalise, organise, create, define) our best life. We spend more time planning a party than we do our life.
Then we wake up one day and we're five years older... still stuck in a reality (situation, relationships, career, health, habits) that we don't really want.
We've compromised.

If we want 'better' (whatever that is for us individually) we need to spend quality time and energy gaining clarity about (defining) specifically what it is we want in.. and from.. our life.

And if we don't define it, we probably won't have it.

We need to stop stumbling and bumbling our way through life.
We need to find our rudder.
The person with no direction is a sad, frustrated, de-motivated and unfulfilled person.
A person who's losing (or has lost) hope.

So often we don't make (significant) decisions, don't take chances, don't have direction and don't have a clearly defined plan for, or certainty about, our future.
We just do what we did yesterday.
We go through the motions.
Again.
We have become creatures of repetition and habit.
We have accepted average.

If you have felt a little rudder-less from time to time, here are some suggestions/thoughts... they will prove to be invaluable IF you do something with them.

1. Spend time determining your life purpose (your reason for being).
No, this is not a five minute process... but do it and you will find your rudder.
You will have direction, purpose, energy, enthusiasm, momentum and joy.
(Remember joy?)
If you struggle to determine your purpose, then start by identifying your beliefs, standards, values, passions, loves, desires and dreams... your purpose will come out of these things.
When I make this suggestion (to explore our life purpose) many people automatically resign the thought to the 'too hard' basket.
Don't be one of them.

2. Decide where you want to be in 1, 2, 5 years.
In your career, your relationships, with your health, your finances, your spiritual life (whatever is important to you). Start with the end in mind (get clarity about where you want to be) and work backwards from there.
Don't panic if you don't know exactly how it's going to happen... first, get some certainty about what you want (specifically) and then you can start to figure out the practical (how-to-get-there) stuff.

3. Make a life-changing commitment.
A commitment that you are going to stop 'coping' with what happens around you and to you... and start living the life of your design.
All successful endeavours start with an idea, a decision, a commitment.
All change starts in our head... when we get to that place (emotionally, psychologically) things will start to happen (practically).
As I've said before... my world will change... when I change.

4. Know that you're the problem and the solution.
Everything else is just a resource, a hurdle, a lesson, an opportunity.

5. Decide what you don't want.
Sometimes doing things back-to-front produces better results.
Gaining certainty about what we don't want (for our life)... will often help us find our rudder.

So now you know what to do.
But will you do what you know?

Let me know your thoughts and where you're from.

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Tuesday, June 19, 2007

I'll Just Sneak out the Back Door... Nobody will Notice

For my international visitors: parts of this post may be somewhat confusing because much of the discussion is in reference to a well known football player in our national league here in Australia (the AFL). Just know that he's a champion athlete and a champion person and you'll get the rest....

So, the other night I went to Robert Harvey's testimonial dinner hosted at Telstra Dome by the St. Kilda Football Club. Rob and I have been friends for a long time and apart from training him for three years when I worked at the club, he has trained on and off in my gym every summer for the last ten years.

To be honest, I'm not a massive fan of the formal, social function... so it was with under-whelming enthusiasm that I put on my suit (me and suits are kinda like oil and water) and headed out the door.
Don't drink, don't smoke, don't 'party', can't dance, not into close-talkers in loud rooms and not a big fan of drunk blokes getting in front of a microphone and talking mindless crap.
As they do.
I'm more of a... make an appearance, shake a few hands, be seen for an hour or so and politely and discretely sneak out the back door while all eyes are focused elsewhere.. kinda bloke.

"No Sam... I was there all night; you must have missed me."

So when Rob's wife Danielle rang me and asked if I would like to attend, my thoughts were (1) yes I'd love to come along and honour the great man and (2) I wonder if I will be able to slide out the back door by nine, nine-thirty.

Love Rob... don't love the formal sit-down function with nine hundred speeches and the overly-enthusiastic, hilarious MC.
Who isn't .
(hilarious).

So me and my not-very-good attitude arrived at Telstra Dome at seven thirty and walked into the auditorium. I had naively assumed that there would be a couple of hundred friends, family, team mates, club people and fans to honour the Champ.
There wasn't.
There was a crowd of about fourteen hundred!

I soon learned a few things:

(1) I was sitting with Rob's in-laws, ten feet from Rob, three feet from the stage; there would be no early departure...
(2) People had paid up to $600 a seat to attend and over two thousand people(!) had missed out... so I was privileged to be there (okay, I felt guilty enough).
(3) I was actually going to enjoy myself (shock, horror... the boring old anti-social fart was having fun).

So the bloke with the less-than-ideal attitude had a great night, sat with some fantastic people, laughed his guts out (why am I writing in the third person again?) and learned a whole bunch about humility, friendship, generosity, work ethic, (good) attitude and what it takes to be a champion person, not just a champion athlete.

It's amazing what we can learn when have a learning mindset.

While we all knew about his amazing achievements on the sporting field: multiple all-Australian player, multiple Best and Fairest awards (club MVP), 349 games (and still going) and dual Brownlow medalist (competition MVP)... all of this paled into insignificance when it was compared to his achievements as a dad, husband, son, team-mate, friend, humanitarian and role model.
I know the last sentence sounds trite and fluffy... but it's absolutely true.

Without doubt, he is the most self-effacing, humble, high-achiever I have ever met.
And I've met and worked with many, many high achievers.

Never talks about himself.
Never looks for accolades.
Hates the spotlight.
Is all about making others feel and look good.

As the night wore on and person after person got up and paid tribute, the great man looked more and more uncomfortable... and while (I'm sure) he appreciated people's thoughts and words, he looked as though he would (genuinely) prefer to be somewhere else.
Kicking a football perhaps.
Hanging out with his kids maybe.

At one point in the evening a painting of the champ in action was auctioned... it went for $67,000! As the fans waged a bidding war for the work of art, my attention switched from the auction action, to the uncomfortable champ squirming in his seat.

Not digging the financial 'war' over a painting of himself... at all.

Even though the sporting public will remember Rob for his amazing sporting achievements, what will ultimately define him is not what he's done as an athlete but who he is as a person.
Unlike some great athletes, his identity is not the sum of his sporting achievements.

Nice.

For me, the most endearing quality a person can have is humility.
It's what makes people attractive.

I'm not talking about pseudo-humility here (very common these days... and an art form of it's own!)... I'm talking about 'real-deal-I-don't-know-what-all-the-fuss-is-about' genuine humility.

And isn't it ironic that often, the people who desperately want to be popular... are more likely to alienate than endear... because of their arrogance and ego.
And their desperate attempts to impress.
Instead of attracting, they repel.
They create the opposite of what they really want.
And invariably they don't learn; they keep doing it.

So I want to say thanks to the champ for a fantastic night, those great mini-cheesecakes - all seven of them (who's got food issues) and a lesson in humility.

The take home message?
Wanna be attractive?.... lose the ego.
Get some humility.

So, two questions for you:
(1) What makes people attractive to you?
(2) What is your favourite quality in a person and why?

Share your thoughts and let us know where you're from...

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Saturday, June 16, 2007

The Choice is Yours

There's a lot of great things about being a kid.

You don't have to pay for stuff.
You get to lick the cake-mix bowl (a personal highlight for me).
You can actually tell people what you think.
You can build cool stuff from junk and grown-ups tell you it's great.
Old people spoil you.
You can use the "I'm-just-a-kid-and-I-didn't-know" line as a defence for pretty much anything.
And every day you do the best drawing ever in the history of the world.

On the other hand, what sucks about being eight is that you don't get too many choices.

I always felt that vegetables (an their apparent value) were over-rated.
Homework?... a conspiracy created by teachers and parents to stop us kids from having fun.
Baths?... clearly a waste of water (I was ahead of my time)... yet my parents were determined for me to wash.
Go figure.
If it was up to me, I would have eaten chocolate cake for every meal, watched cartoons for fifteen hours a day, bathed on a monthly basis and had a pet lion.
Or at the very least, a monkey.

In hindsight, probably a good thing I wasn't the boss of me back then.

Even though being a kid was (by and large) fun... I love being big more.
These days I don't get called Jumbo (often) and every day I get to make lots of choices.
In fact, all the choices.

I am totally the boss of me.
The boss of my life.
The boss of my body.
The boss of my career.
The boss of my happiness.
And the boss of my future.

Even when the crappy, unexpected, narly things happen.. I'm still the boss of my future.
Because I'm the boss of my emotions.
And my reactions.
And my conversations.
And my attitude.
And my decisions.

Cool.

Nobody can make me have a bad day.
'Cause they're not the boss of me.
I can choose to let them bring me down... or I can choose to react differently.
I'll go with different.
Situations, circumstances, challenges and events can't make me have a bad day... 'cause they're not the boss of me either.
I am.
Every day, in every situation.
Whether I know it or not.
Whether I feel like it or not.
I'm in charge.

Captain of the ship.
The SS Me.

Every day I have the choice of having a great day... despite what happens in that day.
Every day I have the choice of seeing the good... while others find the bad.
To learn, while others complain.
To love, while others hate.
To forgive, while other make themselves sick with resentment.
I have all those choices.

Yes, there are many things I can't control.
Yes, bad things happen to good people.
Yes crap happens every day and no, the world's not fair.
But the truth is, I can make my life harder or easier.
I choose easier.
I choose to cope.
I choose to thrive.
I choose a good attitude.
I choose to do different, think different, create different and be different.
I choose amazing.

What happens in my life affects me... but doesn't define me.
My choices will define me... because that's what I've decided.

I choose to be the boss of me.
And my life.

What do you choose?

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Friday, June 15, 2007

Craig Chats with Tonya Roberts on ABC Radio

Hi Team.
No post today but.....
Had an interesting chat with Tonya Roberts last weekend on ABC radio here in Melbourne.
We spoke all things health, fitness, attitude and lifestyle and threw in a little bit of sillyness and light fluff just for fun.
The interview goes for around thirty minutes and is moderately entertaining, interesting and educational!

You can take a listen here.

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Thursday, June 14, 2007

Bench Press for Your Brain

* This post may or may not be relevant for you... but it will be relevant for someone you know. You may want to give them a photocopy... or better still, send them here to take a look.

We all understand what happens to our body as it ages.

Without intervention (an exercise/activity program) we know that our muscles waste, our lung capacity decreases, our heart gets weaker, our bones become brittle, our flexibility and mobility decrease, our reaction time slows, our posture suffers, we move slower and we become more susceptible to illness and injury.
Unless of course we happen to live a naturally active lifestyle (one where we regularly expend lots of energy, move, lift, stress our body... consistently do stuff physically).

I have spoken before on this site about a concept called biological age (also known as physiological age) and we have established that by controlling certain variables (diet, lifestyle, exercise, stress levels) we can absolutely turn back our body clock. Even though we may be fifty (chronologically) we can 'build' ourself the body equivalent to that of a typical thirty year-old (in terms of cardio-vascular function, strength, bone density, blood pressure, flexibility).
If you've punished your body for fifty years it may be a different story of course... but at the very least, you can turn back the clock at little and see a notable improvement in health, physical function and overall fitness.

What happens (typically) with a large percentage of the population is that we get to a point in time when we simply stop moving as much. We stop lifting, walking, hammering, climbing, cleaning, working.... doing physical stuff. And as soon as this happens our body begins to age at a faster rate. It's hard to quantify (the rate of ageing) as it varies from person to person... but let's just go with... a much greater rate.
(Than our active counterparts).

For many people, retirement should be renamed the-beginning-of-the-end; they stop doing pretty much everything that kept them in shape (I'm talking about from a health and function perspective here... not from a looking incredible perspective).
I'm not suggesting that we all work until we're ninety five... but for some people, the day they retire is the day they stop using their mind and their body (in a significant way).
The day they begin to deteriorate.
Ironic, when you consider how excited most people are about that day.

And while it's common and 'normal' for some of us to train our body in an effort to stay young physically, surprisingly, the majority of us don't consciously take a similar approach when it comes to keeping our mind in shape (that is, consciously 'exercising' our mind like we do our body).

Interesting when we consider these two facts:

1) People typically slow down mentally as they age.... short-term memory loss (where are my keys?), process information slower, find it harder to concentrate and focus, more easily confused, become vague and tend to be less creative and less adventurous.

2) They don't have to! Countless studies (and simple observation) tell us that our mind, like any other muscle (okay, it's not a muscle but you get my point), needs to be trained to stay in shape. Excluding people with specific medical conditions, we find that people who have remained mentally active as they have aged typically see little (or no) deterioration in their level of brain function.

The moment we stop using it... we start losing it.
The good news is that our brain (like our body) is amazing and can adapt (grow 'muscle') at any age. We can (to an extent) undo some (if not most) of the damage.

It's great to be in shape physically but what's the point of having four percent body-fat, Olympian biceps and veins on our veins, if we have a mind like a Dalmatian?
So after two hundred years of helping people get in shape physically, here are my tips for developing and maintaining a high-performance mind.

1. Set goals.
The moment we stop setting goals is the moment we start going backwards. Without goals we don't have to think, plan, rationalise, problem solve or create (as much).

2. Laugh.
It's not illegal to laugh, be silly or have fun as you age. Although some grumpy old farts will take me to task on this... they're wrong.
"Hey Johnnie... pull my finger."
(So juvenile).

3. Play.
"We don't stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop playing."

Two of my favourite people in the world are a (nearly) seventy years-young couple who ski, ride mountain bikes, run up and down sand dunes, hike, lift weights, travel, help others, play practical jokes and hang out with 'silly' young people.

4. Study.
You don't have to go back to college and get your PhD. (although you might) but maybe explore short courses, workshops... something to blow out those cerebral cob webs and get those rusty cogs turning once again.
Most people stop (consciously) learning when they finish school.
Pity.
One of my staff (Rona) is fifty two. She started university (for the first time) last year. She will graduate with her bachelors degree (in Exercise Science) when she's fifty four and has already informed me that she wants to continue studying once she completes her current course. The other day she told me.. "it's the best thing I've ever done... in my life!"
(Condolences to her husband!).

5. Learn a new language.
Research tells us that people who speak two languages (regularly) age (mentally) at a slower rate than their uni-lingual (made that up... I think) buddies. They stay in shape (mentally) for longer... It even delays the onset of Alzheimer's.
Now, if you spoke three languages...

6. Express yourself creatively.
Write something... a book, some poetry, a business plan, start your own blog.
Paint, draw, sculpt... my father began to paint at sixty five.. and now is an awesome professional artist.
Invent something... a lot of the best inventors are crusty old guys.... c'mon on you crusty old guys... invent something!

7. Read.
And not just romantic novels... read stuff that makes you use your brain... challenges you a little. Makes you think, reason, remember; exercise your brain.

8. Consciously try and remember stuff.
It's there.. you just need to dust it off.
Find your old school photos and name all your class mates.
Try and remember (and replay in your mind) moments in time.
Your first boyfriend's, next door neighbour's, brother's... name (the one you kissed).

9. Do some mental workouts.
Crosswords - fun and great for your brain.
Puzzles... problem solving stuff... force yourself to think, reason, calculate.
When you have time on your hands is the best time to brain-train... In the car, on the train, bus, waiting rooms.. do maths problems, spell words, try and recall specific information... hmm, what does DNA stand for again?
What is the capital of Poland?

10. Have a project.
Something to keep you thinking, communicating, planning, solving problems, remembering... in general; bench pressing for your brain.
Might be landscaping your property, starting a not-for-profit organisation, building a small business, rebuilding your '56 Buick, climbing Everest... whatever it is that keeps you stimulated, learning, adapting, growing and mentally in shape.

Now, what was my first girlfriend's favourite color and what was that perfume she always wore?

Hang on a minute... what was her name!!

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Monday, June 11, 2007

The REAL SECRET of Success.

Part of my job as an educator, motivator, coach (etc.) is to sell stuff.
Kind of.
Not physical stuff (toasters, convertibles, cross-bows... although that'd be fun) but more the emotional and psychological stuff like... ideas, concepts, philosophies, strategies.

In order to get people to take action I am constantly 'selling' the notion that creating our best life (body, health, relationships, career, finances, happiness) is largely about decisions, attitude and personal responsibility. Most people 'buy' this as it's kind of a no-brainer; not difficult to understand or accept.
Although some still struggle with it.

But without doubt, the toughest 'sale' I ever have to make (and I make it daily) is the value (idea, notion, concept, whatever you want to call it) of discipline.

When I tell people that they don't need a pill, powder, potion, product, gadget or gizmo... they simply need some discipline in their world, they are typically disappointed.
They really want someone or something to do it (whatever it is) for them.

People don't wanna hear that achieving their goals and creating forever results is largely about discipline; they want quick, easy, painless and convenient.
Imagine having to actually work for something... that might take some self control, mental and emotional strength and discipline.
And personal growth.

"Err... what's option B?"

"C'mon Craig... discipline is such an outdated notion... what is this, 1963??... ya killin' me... haven't you got something a little more contemporary... perhaps some new self-help program like the 'accelerated-learning-and-incredible-results-with-no-effort' program... or something similar?"

Imagine turning up for day one of your new job as a sales representative, only to discover that the 'product' you're selling is discipline.
Bummer.
"Are you kidding me.... can't I sell cake... or chocolate... or plasma screens.... something people actually wanna buy?"
And then to make matters worse, your boss informs you that your remuneration is commission-based.
Doh!
Better get a second job.

Some things are easy to sell...
Donuts for example.
Find some teenagers, put up a sign...bingo; you're in business.
It's a donut-fest.
Or sports cars... find yourself a Porsche dealership, a few forty five year-old guys with big egos, small.. self-esteems and a bunch of cash (or more likely, credit) and bingo again... ya got Boxsters driving themselves out of the showroom.

Not that I spend a lot of time trawling the web for personal development stuff, but with the little research I have done, I haven't seen too much written on the value of discipline or it's place in the personal development (life renovation) process.
Some, but not much.
I believe it's importance is incredibly under-rated.

I've seen plenty on goal setting.
Lots on visualisation.
Lots on attitude and 'attraction'.
And a bunch of feel-good, mindless, repetitive, you-can-do-whatever-you-set-your-mind-to.. fluff.
It seems (to me anyway) that some people (writers, speakers, experts.. etc.) are more concerned with telling people what they want to hear (what's popular and easy to sell) than they are with telling them the truth.
Me on the other hand....

So I'm gonna throw a thought up for your consideration and it's this:

"When it comes to creating genuine, life-long positive change there is no more important ingredient than discipline (some people may also call it self-control or mental toughness)."

I'm the first to admit that creating our best life is multi-dimensional, multi-factorial process and that there are often many variables... and while things like visualisation, positive thinking, resources, knowledge, goal-setting, time management and planning ... are often important ingredients in the success formula... the one non-negotiable is discipline.

All successful people have a level of discipline which separates them from the pack.
This discipline influences how they think, communicate, choose, react and behave.
What they do.
How they live.
In fact, it's is the underlying basis of their success.

And the challenge for someone whose life is about helping people move from mediocre to amazing (teachers, coaches, motivators, writers) is that... teaching and selling the value of discipline is a tough gig!
It ain't easy.
Kinda like trying to sell brussel sprouts.
"No really..

Motivational Speaker

Exercise Scientist

Motivation Melbourne

Renovate Your Life Blog

Bloggersauras?... it is SO a word.

Stop Interrupting me with Your Logic; I'm Having a Breakdown.

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The Ship Without a Rudder

I'll Just Sneak out the Back Door... Nobody will Notice

The Choice is Yours

Craig Chats with Tonya Roberts on ABC Radio

Bench Press for Your Brain

The REAL SECRET of Success.